The Catholic Family Handbook by Rev. George Kelly
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THE CATHOLIC FAMILY HANDBOOK

CHAPTER 5: WHY SEND YOUR CHILD TO CATHOLIC SCHOOLS?


THE most important assignment husbands and wives have from God is to see that their children are properly educated. This is a prime and basic purpose of marriage itself. And while the process of education goes on for a lifetime, it does require today a certain amount of schooling, particularly during the formative years.

When parents, therefore, choose a school for their children, they delegate to the teachers a large part of their responsibilities and a significant portion of their child's education. It is important that they realize the implications of that choice.

If you choose, you can send your child to a public school, to a private school, to a parochial school. You can hire a private tutor, even keep him home and tutor him yourself, since the State merely establishes minimum standards of achievement. As a practical matter your choice usually lies between the parochial school and the public nonsectarian school. Before making such a choice you should first determine what purpose you intend his schooling to serve. In a general way, persons holding all shades of religious belief agree that the school should help prepare a child for life as a responsible adult. But since all men do not agree on the purpose and meaning of life, they obviously cannot agree on the type of school which can best prepare the child for it.

As a Catholic, of course, you take the position outlined in one of the first questions in the catechism--that your child was born to know, love, and serve God in this world in order to be happy with Him in the next. You either believe this or you don't. If you do, his schooling must help him achieve this goal.

This existence and eternal presence of God is the most important fact of our lives. On this truth all other knowledge is built. The work of the school, like the work of parental education itself, is to make the child see this truth and all other truths which flow from it--truths about the world, himself and other people. All of his experiences-- intellectual, social, moral--must be so guided that nothing is wanting to his training as an intellectual, a man and a Christian. The child must be taught religion, not merely for information but to strengthen his ties with the Heavenly Father, Redeemer and Sanctifier. He must be taught social studies to give him that understanding which will tie him more closely to other human beings. He must be taught science to help him appreciate and use with care the creatures of the material world.

While bringing ideas and facts to the child, the teacher must relate these to basic Christian principles and our American heritage. The child should be educated to hold sound convictions about the dependence of all men upon God, the rights and duties that belong to every man because of his human dignity and his social nature, the sacredness of the family, the great worth of human work, the obligation of men and nations to share material and spiritual goods with others. By its very nature, then, knowledge of God and His divine plan cannot be a thing apart. Rather it must be the guiding light which illuminates every other subject that we learn.

Justice Robert H. Jackson of the United States Supreme Court in 1948 said this about religion and education: "It would not seem practical to teach either practice or appreciation of the arts if we are to forbid exposure of youth to any religious influences. Music without sacred music, architecture minus the cathedral, or painting without the scriptural themes would be eccentric and incomplete.... Certainly a course in English literature that omitted the Bible and other powerful uses of our mother tongue for religious ends would be pretty barren.... The fact is that, for good or ill, nearly everything which gives meaning to life, is saturated with religious influences.... One can hardly respect a system of education which would leave the student wholly ignorant of the currents of religious thought that move the world today...for a part in which he is being prepared."

When your child attends elementary school, his teacher probably influences him for more hours each day than you do. What he learns from her will have a powerful effect upon his character. Simple prudence dictates, therefore, that the influence to which he is exposed at school should intensify and reinforce your own teachings. This is possible only in a school which recognizes God, because your child will learn to be truthful, honest and just in his dealings with his fellow man and to respect authority only as he understands God. The only true motive for these and all other virtues is the knowledge that we are dependent on God for everything and that He requires obedience to His law as a test of our love for Him.

Supporters of nonsectarian education often object when Catholics characterize public schools as "Godless." But the cold fact is that they are Godless in the literal sense of that word. Inasmuch as our society consists of citizens with every conceivable gradation of belief and those who profess no faith at all, it has been deemed necessary to eliminate such a controversial subject as God from the public school curriculum. One need not look far for graphic illustrations of this fact. In some areas, even attempts to start the school day with a prayer to the "Supreme Author of Life" have met with rebuffs from those who advocate "separation of Church and State." Some schools prohibit the observance of Christmas as a religious feast. The children may sing harmless jingles, but they may not learn that this great feast celebrates the birthday of Jesus Christ.

Ironically, attempts to teach even the simplest facts about religion are hemmed in by so many restrictions in most public school systems that such education becomes tailored to the wishes of the tiny minority of citizens who oppose every religion and even God Himself. As Monsignor Carl J. Ryan, superintendent of schools of the Cincinnati archdiocese, has pointed out, these persons are truly a privileged class. "When the out-and-out secularist pays his tax money, he gets exactly the kind of school his ideology calls for--one from which God and mention of God are entirely excluded." No less an authority than Thomas Jefferson, speaking on the teaching of religious truth, said, "The relations which exist between man and his Maker, and the duties resulting from those relations, are the most interesting and important to every human being and the most incumbent on his study and investigation."

How can your child recognize the pre-eminence of God and the necessity of religious faith for his salvation if these facts are completely ignored by one of the most important influences in his life? Even a young child will tend to question the religious beliefs and moral lessons taught to him at home when they are considered of such little importance that they go unmentioned at school. No Christian parent could maintain that a knowledge of geography--or music or dancing--is more important to a child's development than his religious training; yet public schools, by their very ignoring of God, can subtly create this impression.

Church teaching on schools. The Church always has recognized that schools in which moral teaching holds first place are essential to nourish and protect the faith of young people. For example, in 1884, Pope Leo XIII wrote to the French archbishops and bishops: "It is of the highest importance that the offspring of Christian marriages should be thoroughly instructed in the precepts of religion; and that the various studies by which youth is fitted for the world should be joined with that of religion. To divorce these is to wish that youth should be neutral as regards his duties to God: a system of education in itself fallacious, and particularly fatal in tender years, for it opens the door to atheism, and closes it on religion. Christian parents must therefore be careful that their children receive religious instruction as soon as they are capable of understanding it; and that nothing may, in the schools they attend, blemish their faith or their morals. Both the natural and the divine law impose this duty on them, nor can parents on any ground whatever be freed from this obligation."

Because centuries of experience have taught that the child exposed to schooling which ignores religious training is in grave danger of losing his faith, the Church has made it a universal rule that Catholics must send their children to religious schools when such institutions are available. Canon law states:

"All the faithful are to be so reared from childhood that not only shall nothing be offered them opposed to the Catholic faith or moral propriety, but also that religious and moral training shall be given the most important place. Catholic children shall not attend non- Catholic schools, neutral schools, or mixed schools, that is, schools that are also open to non-Catholics. Only the local ordinary (the bishop) is competent to determine, in concordance with the norm of the instructions of the Holy See, in what circumstances and with what safeguards to overcome the danger of perversion, attendance at such schools may be tolerated." Theologians interpret this law as meaning that Catholics who deliberately send their children to non-Catholic schools, when Catholic schooling is available to them and in the absence of some compelling reason, may be guilty of sin.

In view of the Church's clear teaching, why do some parents choose secular education for their children when Catholic schools are available? Let us examine the commonly cited reasons.

"A public school education is superior." This may be true in a few parts of the country--in subjects other than religion, but it is not true in the country as a whole. Despite the education and idealism which public school teachers bring to their task, it is fair to say that their dedication does not equal that of the priests, nuns and lay brothers who voluntarily give their entire lives to the young. One cannot visit a Catholic school without being deeply impressed by the sense of complete devotion which Catholic teachers display. A teacher's most important requirement is that she have a whole-hearted interest in her pupils' complete development--intellectual, physical, moral and spiritual, and Catholic teachers have this in an abundant degree.

In comparing schools by worldly standards, the usual measurement is the mark that children receive on competitive tests. When parochial and public school children compete, the former almost invariably do as well as, or better than, their rivals. Much of the explanation of this scholastic success lies in the more determined methods of discipline practiced by Catholic teachers.

We have some substantiation of the above judgment in the study made in 1948 by Dr. Roger Lennon, Director of the Test Research and Service Division of the World Book Company. He correlated data based on the Metropolitan Achievement Test results for about 100,000 elementary school pupils drawn from six dioceses, and made comparisons with a comparable group of public school students. The intelligence quotients of the two samples were about equal, while the parochial school children were two or three months younger in age.

The conclusions of the study were as follows:

1. Reading There was little difference up to the 6th grade, but the superiority of the parochial students was very apparent in the 7th grade and continued through the 9th grade.

2. Vocabulary There was no appreciable difference up to the 5th grade. But from the 6th grace on the parochial school students were superior and in the 9th grade were more than a year above the public school norm.

3. Arithmetic From the 2nd grade through the 9th grade, the Catholic school students were consistently superior.

4. Language usage Except in the 7th grade, the achievement of the parochial school students was higher.

5. Spelling The parochial school students consistently had the advantage and in the 8th and 9th grades were one year in advance of the public school norm.

6. Literature A third to a half year superiority is manifested in grades 6 through 9.

7. History, civics, geography These are the subjects in which the greatest superiority of the parochial over the public school is manifested--at least by a year in almost all cases.

8. Science Here is an area of relative weakness in parochial schools. Their students were below norm by a half year in grades 6 through 9.

With these exceptions noted, Dr. Lennon concludes: "In all other subjects and at all grade levels the parochial school achievement is consistently superior."

As we have seen, however, success in academic subjects should not be the sole basis upon which a school is judged. Even were the Catholic school in a particular community to hold a place below the tax- supported schools in scholastic achievement, it would nevertheless be superior. For it teaches the child the most important subject in his life--his position in relationship to his Creator, his fellow man and nature.

"My child can learn about religion at home and at Sunday School." This is actually a basic teaching of the secularists--the false notion that religion can be made a thing apart. The child who is led to believe that religion is a subject reserved for Sundays is likely to grow up as a "Sunday Catholic" if, indeed, he keeps his faith at all. Religion cannot be recognized only one day in the week and ignored the rest. Truths learned in religion class are more important than truths in other subjects, because religious truths must influence every thought, word and deed of every waking hour.

Moreover, a child cannot obtain in a weekly class the understanding he requires to meet the challenges of his adult life as a Catholic. In Catholic schools, the study of religion is a regular part of the curriculum and is taught just as thoroughly as reading, writing, arithmetic and other subjects. The child gains a deep and reverent understanding of the principles of his faith, and practicing his religion becomes second nature to him. Parents who believe that Sunday School instruction is adequate for a religious education would protest vigorously if their child were instructed only one hour each week in geography, history or some other subject of considerably less importance in the long view.

Father Joseph Fichter, S.J., who in 1958 completed a fine sociological study of one school system, confirms this judgment: "Here is ultimately the key to the difference between the public school child and the parochial school child. The latter gets more and better reasons for his attitudes and behavior. By systematic observation in the classrooms, and by the testimony of police and fire departments, as well as of pupils and teachers who have had experience in both types of schools, there is demonstrable proof that the parochial school children are more orderly and self-controlled than the public school children. They have a better attendance record on school days and fewer of them get in trouble with juvenile court authorities."

"I want my child to learn to live with all kinds of people." Persons making this statement are obviously aware that there are basic differences between Catholics and non-Catholics--but they fail to realize that their child may adopt the beliefs of those with whom he comes in contact.

Parochial school pupils actually do meet children of various racial origins. The Church is universal and its membership is made up of all races and classes. There is a diversity in conformity. In a typical Catholic school, your child will meet youngsters of Irish, Italian, German, Polish, English, French and other extractions.

"I went to public schools, and they did not hurt me." If so, the solid experience of the Church proves that you are an exception. In any event, one example does not prove a case. It is even true that some graduates of Catholic schools fall away from the faith while some graduates of public institutions are model Catholics. On the whole, however, a child's chances of remaining a practicing Catholic are much greater if he has had a thorough grounding in the teachings of his religion.

If parents' testimonials are the best advertisement for a school system, there is ample reason to believe that Catholic institutions would score higher than public ones. Almost invariably, parents who attended Catholic elementary schools, high schools and colleges are most insistent that their own children also be educated in Catholic institutions. An interesting observation on this point was made by Amleto Giovanni Cardinal Cicognani, for twenty-five years Apostolic Delegate to the United States.

"Fifty years ago American bishops had to insist that a parish build a school and had to exert all their influence to see that there was a good attendance," the Cardinal remarked. "Now it is just the opposite; it is from the lay people that the pressure comes. If a parish does not have a school, they come to the priest and insist that he must build one."

The Catholic school system in the United States is virtually unique in that its support depends entirely upon the people. Unlike Catholic schools in many other countries, there are no State subsidies. Yet American Catholics support thousands of elementary schools, high schools and colleges even while they also pay taxes to operate public institutions. They carry a burden of double taxation because they realize the inestimable benefits that their children can derive when religious and moral training are made an integral part of education. Parents who have been educated in non-Catholic schools often are simply not aware of the values they have missed.

The case for Catholic higher education. The reasons for education a child in a Catholic primary school apply in the case of high schools and colleges as well. Many Catholic educators make an even stronger case for Catholic schooling on these higher levels.

The typical high school student tends to analyze religious values searchingly. This is a time when he tends to rebel against authority as he has come to know it. He often will take a position directly opposite the one held by his parents, simply because by doing so he expresses his desire for independence. In addition, at this time his intellectual powers are developing rapidly and he is capable of engaging in serious, intelligent argument for the first time. He is not satisfied with answers given in a catechism. He demands a more highly developed rationale for his actions.

If he has had only an elementary background in religion, he may be unprepared for pressures exerted against the faith as he advances into adolescence and beyond. In a Catholic high school and college, he receives advanced training in religion which satisfies his own more mature demands.

Commentators on the manners and mores of teen-agers agree that a desire to conform, amounting almost to a compulsion, is characteristic of this age. The typical high school student wants to be like his fellow students from the shape of his haircut to the color of his socks. When Catholic students are in a minority--as they frequently are in public high schools--their ideals and aspirations will almost certainly be weakened as they strive to conform to what the majority thinks and the way it acts. Parents who voluntarily choose public high schools, expecting their youngsters to retain their beliefs and ideals in the face of such strong pressures, place a grave burden upon them.

There are more advantages to the typical Catholic high school than most parents perhaps realize. Recently Dr. Leonard H. Watts, a teacher at the Technical Teachers' College at Melbourne, Australia, and an exchange professor for a year at the Southern Oregon College of Education, was asked to describe the high school system of Australia. He said that boys and girls generally attend separate high schools, that students wear school uniforms and that girls are usually forbidden to use cosmetics; that students get enough homework to discourage dating; that sex education is left with the parents rather than taken over by the school; and that pupils are encouraged to participate in sports to provide outlets for their physical energies. Dr. Watts was asked this question because of Australia's phenomenally low rate of juvenile delinquency, and because high school marriages and pregnancies among high school girls are extremely rare there. If you are familiar with the typical Catholic high school in America, you will find a remarkable correlation between the Catholic and Australian systems.

If finances permit, encourage your child to attend a Catholic college. Of the hundreds of Catholic institutions in the country, he can doubtless find many which offer courses in which he is interested. Catholic colleges and universities, like Catholic schools on lower levels, have scholastic records which equal and sometimes excel those of secular institutions generally.

The student of college age usually dates; if he attends a Catholic institution and has Catholic classmates, he is more likely to date Catholic girls. Since many marriages begin with campus courtships, the danger of his entering a mixed marriage will be almost automatically reduced by his choice of a college.

Catholic college training will cap his knowledge of his faith and will give him a complete intellectual basis for belief. He will also be more likely to be governed by idealistic motives in choosing a career. He will learn to serve God and man and in doing so will be equipped to achieve far greater happiness from his life's work than one who takes up a profession only for secular or materialistic reasons.

A Catholic college education is especially recommended for young women. Here, emphasis will be placed on motherhood as a career. A common fault of secular colleges is that they educate women primarily for careers outside the home. In this process the desire to be a mother and a home- maker is weakened, if not destroyed; for all too often, nonsectarian institutions give the student the distinct impression that her college years will be wasted unless she obtains paid employment and continues to further her career after marriage and motherhood. In a Catholic woman's college, training for Christian motherhood takes priority.

Responsibilities of parents with children in public schools. Because Catholics must build and maintain schools without state aid, and also because we constitute a very small minority in some sections of the country, parochial schooling may not be available in your community. Nevertheless you should see that your children obtain adequate religious instruction and training.

First, you should co-operate fully by sending your youngsters to catechism classes at your church. From their earliest days, teach them that these classes are of the utmost importance for both their earthly happiness and the salvation of their souls.

Secondly, try to compensate at home for their loss of religious training at school. Apply the suggestions offered in the chapter on "Religious Practices in Your Home," frequent the sacraments with your children, encourage discussions on religious subjects, and make certain that they faithfully fulfill the assignments given at catechism school.

Thirdly, remain alert for indications that they may be unduly influenced by non-Catholic thinking. In communities heavily populated by those outside the faith, Catholic children seem to be especially subject to the fallacy that "one religion is as good as another." Once this idea is accepted it is an easy step into a mixed marriage and the loss of faith. You can help counteract this influence by impressing upon your child that the Church's unbroken line of authority extends back to St. Peter, whom Our Lord designated as the founder of His true Church.

Since you may be obliged to answer many questions which your children are asked by non-Catholic schoolmates, or to refute misstatements which your children hear, you might do well to equip yourself with literature that rebuts objections that non-Catholics raise against Church teaching. An excellent and inexpensive aid is the three-volume set, "Radio Replies," consisting of answers to more than 4,000 questions asked of Catholic preachers. The book is published in a paper-cover edition by Fathers Rumble and Carty of the Radio Replies Press Society, St. Paul, Minn.

Finally, if your child attends a non-Catholic high school or college, strongly urge him to join the Newman Club, if one is in operation, or even to help start one. A Newman Club is an organization of Catholic students in a non-Catholic school. Through courses of instructions and social activities, it helps to strengthen the Catholic student against influences which tend to draw him away from the faith, and also helps him to form friendships with other Catholic boys and girls. Membership in a Newman Club often makes the difference between a student's maintaining the faith and losing it.

You and your teacher make one team. A small minority of parents believe that they fulfill their moral obligations once they enroll their child in a Catholic school. Nothing could be further from the truth. Regardless of what school your child attends, the primary responsibility for his education remains yours. His teachers merely serve as your substitutes.

The implications of this principle are enormous. It means that you must supervise your child's studies at home, and maintain his moral standards by both your teaching and example. For Catholic schooling usually can only reinforce the moral training you give at home; it generally cannot substitute for it. On this point, too, you must be prepared to hold fast against the modern trend.

As Dr. Grayson Kirk, president of Columbia University, has pointed out, one of the truly terrifying developments of our time is the indifference of parents toward their children's schooling. Too many parents have abandoned too much of their responsibility to the schools, says Dr. Kirk. He adds: "These parents seem to feel that if they feed and clothe the child, and provide him with a television set, the school should do everything else. The school cannot overlook its duty, but it can be successful only if the parents realize that the home, when properly organized, is a far more potent educational unit."

There are several basic ways in which you can co-operate with the school. The first, of course, is never to lessen the teacher's authority in the eyes of your child. Just as one parent must uphold the other in matters of discipline, parents must uphold the teacher. At times you may seriously question the teacher's judgment. Rather than to express doubts before the child, however, it is better to discuss the matter with her privately. Of course, since young children especially are prone to misinterpret what an adult says, wise parents do not believe everything their youngsters tell them about their teachers.

You will avert possible crises in your child's later years at school by helping him to develop good study habits from his first grade on. If he has a homework assignment, insist that it take priority over all other activities--dancing lessons, television, comic books and other distractions. Require him to study at a specified period each day-- immediately after the evening meal is a time favored in many homes. Ask him what his assignments are and check them after they have been completed to make certain that he has done them satisfactorily. Ideally, when he arrives at high school he should accept full responsibility for his work. He should do his assignments without prodding and should habitually spend two or three hours each school night preparing his lessons for the next day. Many difficulties that youngsters encounter in high school could have been avoided if they had learned to study effectively during their elementary school years.

Take advantage of opportunities to meet your child's teacher and to discuss his scholastic record with her. Teachers in modern Catholic schools encourage parents' interest and realize that pupils make faster progress when school and home co-operate. Indicative of this trend toward mutual co-operation is the rapid growth in recent years of parents' guilds, parent-teacher associations, and similar organizations. Parents' nights, on which fathers and mothers are encouraged to visit the school and meet the teachers, are now sponsored by an increasing number of parishes. At such times, parents can learn of teachers' problems, and teachers can gain new insights into home conditions which may affect a child's record at school.

A vast field of parent-teacher co-operation lies open, however. Parents can do much to relieve nuns and lay teachers of some of their time- consuming chores, and thus give teachers time for more productive work with the children. In one parish, for instance, mothers maintain the school lunchroom and library. In another school, parents take turns keeping records in the principal's office, enabling one nun to spend more hours in the classroom. Some parent-teacher groups maintain a car- pool service. Mothers make themselves available to drive nuns to school meetings, teacher conferences, medical and dental appointments and the like. Such services, given cheerfully by parents, help build an atmosphere of warm co-operation and loyalty to the school which the child absorbs and reflects in his own conduct.

Don't push your child to the limit. Within the past few decades there has been a growing acceptance of the fact that children have different levels of intelligence and different aptitudes. Thus one youngster who achieves an average of 70 may have worked harder for it than the one with natural gifts who never goes below go, Carefully designed tests make it possible to determine with high accuracy whether your child is mentally quicker than the average, and also--in a general way--what his potentialities for intellectual advancement actually are. A person with an intelligence quotient of 100 may be average, for example, but would lack the intellectual ability to complete a college course. On the other hand, a youngster with an I.Q. of 140 should be capable of superior work at school.

As a parent, you naturally should encourage your youngster to do the best work of which he is capable. For the innately bright child, this may mean an average of 95; for a child less gifted, it may mean a passing grade of 70. The latter child should not be expected to perform as successfully as the former, and it is unjust to hold him up to ridicule because he does not equal a mark set by one gifted with superior mental endowment to begin with.

A wise priest once told the story of the elementary school boy who insisted that his teacher's main job was to "learn him." This was not bad grammar; it was hard fact. You cannot truly encourage your child to do his best work unless you truly learn him--unless you know what standards can reasonably be expected of him. Unfortunately, however, you may not be the best judge of his ability. Your opinion may be colored by natural pride and by your lack of opportunity to compare his work with that of his classmates. Often by consulting his teachers--and admitting that their objective judgment may be more valid than your own--you will be able to determine what rate of scholastic progress he should reasonably make.

Some parents literally drive a child to scholastic success. They berate him if he fails to achieve the best average in his class, instill an abnormal spirit of competition, and hold up to scorn his fellow pupils who are in the lower half scholastically. Sometimes teachers themselves contribute to this competitiveness by excessively praising the children with the highest marks and ridiculing the less successful ones. This is a mistake. For important as scholastic achievement is, it should not be established as the most important goal. Spiritual and emotional values should never be sacrificed for scholastic accomplishment. The child who is lovingly accepted for what he is--whether he be normally bright or dull--and who is encouraged to achieve in proportion to his ability, will become a better adjusted citizen than one driven to obtain high marks by perfectionist parents.

Often a young man or woman, trained in the idea that scholastic achievement is the ultimate value, discovers with a shock that many of life's important places are filled by persons whose intellectual accomplishments may be only about average, but whose qualities of soul and heart aid them far more in succeeding at their vocations. A good rule for parents, therefore, is this: Encourage your children to do their best work scholastically, but don't nag them so as to jeopardize the development of their whole personality.

How to help your youngster go to college. In the past few years there has been a growing realization that higher education is virtually a necessity for professional and business success, a vast increase in applications to colleges, and a failure of colleges to grow along with the increased demands. As a result, thousands of high school graduates now are turned away from college doors every year. In addition, hundreds of thousands of young persons with an intellectual ability to do college work fail to realize their potentialities, largely because they lack a clear understanding of the advantages of college training and because their parents have not created an environment in which the desire for higher education is nourished. After examining scholastic records and interviewing thousands of students, researchers have firmly established that your attitudes as a parent and the kind of home you provide may decide whether your child applies for, and is accepted by, a college. One surprising fact they have uncovered is that money is not as important for higher education as most people imagine; for instance, Professor Ralph S. Berdie of the University of Minnesota found, after examining 25,000 histories, that young men and women with the ability and desire to go to college usually can do so even if they are poor. Scholarships, opportunities for part-time employment and long-term loans are all available to worthy students.

Of course, it helps if you can give financial aid to your youngsters. But it may be even more helpful if, from his youngest days, you create an atmosphere which encourages him to develop his mind and cements his determination to gain a higher education. How can you do this?

By letting him know, from his early days in elementary school, that you will be happy if he attends. (Researchers have found that 99 per cent of college students have their parents' approval. Only one in a hundred reaches college over the outright opposition of his mother and father.)

By maintaining a home free of tension and bickering. (It has been proved statistically that children of broken marriages, or from homes where parents do not live together in peace, have a poor chance of developing study habits which will carry them above the high school level.)

By taking an active part in church, P.T.A. and community affairs. (Activities like these will help you meet other conscientious parents who also will want to give their children maximum educational opportunities. By discussing your child's development with such friends, you will also be able to gauge whether he is progressing as well as he might.)

By providing opportunities for self-education. (Many college students told interviewers that they were introduced to the public library by their parents at an early age and were encouraged to form good reading habits. A child with access to wholesome magazines and newspapers, a comprehensive reference shelf and other aids to information, has a splendid opportunity to satisfy his curiosity and develop his intellect.)

By encouraging him to associate with other boys and girls with college aspirations. (The desire to keep up with the Joneses is as strong in youngsters as in adults; if your youngster has as friends only boys and girls who intend to quit school as soon as they are legally able, his own educational ambition may be stifled.)

By encouraging him to consider what his vocation may be. (If he has a clear goal, he can more easily realize how a higher education will help him achieve it. You can encourage him by discussing the many opportunities to serve God and man which come to persons with college training.)

Where your child lives while attending college may depend mainly upon your financial situation and whether schools are within commuting distance. Educators generally agree that the typical student acquires more benefits from college if he lives away from home. By doing so, he learns to accept full responsibility for his own actions, not only scholastically but in all phases of his life.

Even if you can afford to pay for your child's education in its entirety, many authorities believe that he should be required to work during vacations to meet at least the incidental charges. Since he is learning to accept new responsibilities in other ways, he also should assume some of the burden of his own upkeep. A common arrangement is for parents to make the basic college payments--fees for tuition, board, books, etc.--while the student himself pays for his clothing and whatever spending money he may need during the year.

School costs versus "school palaces." Much controversy has developed in recent years over increasing school costs throughout the nation. The basic point at issue is whether too much money is being spent on facilities and activities which have not traditionally been considered part of a school's function. For instance, in one community a school has a "dancing room" where youngsters learn the art of ballroom dancing. Many high schools have smoking rooms for their teen-age pupils. Others have elaborate gymnasiums and swimming pools which are the envy of the most heavily endowed colleges, cafeterias with cooking facilities which most industrial corporations cannot duplicate for their employees, and parking lots for students' cars which department stores in the same town cannot provide for their customers.

Catholic parents of children in parochial schools have tended to remain aloof from the argument over "school palaces." As taxpayers, they have as much right to discuss the question as have parents of children attending the schools involved. Moreover, school costs affect not only taxes which all citizens must pay, but also the contributions Catholics must make to support their own school system. For Catholic institutions often are placed in a position where they must duplicate the facilities provided by public schools in order to attract or maintain their own enrollments.

Obviously, schoolchildren deserve the best training that the community can afford. But it is a serious mistake to assume that physical facilities alone can provide the training of body and mind which the child requires. It is ironic that often those communities which spend extravagant sums on buildings keep to a minimum their expenditures for the most important element in the school system--the teachers who must mold the characters and minds of the pupils. Persons in these communities overlook the fundamental truth that where an adequate and properly trained teaching staff exists, many frills of modern education can be eliminated without real loss to the child.

A danger of "school palaces" is that they tend to make pupils dissatisfied with their own home surroundings, which may be drab by comparison. In addition, by affording almost limitless recreational and social opportunities, the school usurps the functions of the home and helps to condition the child to accept the idea of the "super-state" where the government takes care of its citizens from the cradle to the grave. In this process, the most precious asset of any civilization-- its stable family life--is gradually undermined. Each time a school takes over a new function which was previously performed in your home, your influence over your child is correspondingly weakened.
"So let us be confident, let us not be unprepared, let us not be outflanked, let us be wise, vigilant, fighting against those who are trying to tear the faith out of our souls and morality out of our hearts, so that we may remain Catholics, remain united to the Blessed Virgin Mary, remain united to the Roman Catholic Church, remain faithful children of the Church."- Abp. Lefebvre
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RE: The Catholic Family Handbook by Rev. George Kelly - by Stone - 12-14-2021, 11:12 AM

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