Divine Intimacy: Meditations on the Interior Life for Everyday of the Year

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329. THE ROAD TO OUR ETERNAL HOME

TWENTIETH SUNDAY AFTER PENTECOST

PRESENCE OF GOD - O Lord, teach me the way to come to You.


MEDITATION

1. The liturgy of the last Sundays after Pentecost has a special note, warning us of the approaching end of all things. In fact, the liturgical year is almost at its close, and, as it ends, it invites us to consider the uncertainty of the present life and to turn our eyes toward the eternal life awaiting us. Spontaneously we stop to reflect on the condition of our own soul: How have we employed the time that God has given us? In the Introit we find the humble confession: “O Lord, we have sinned against Thee, we have not obeyed Thy commandments,” and in the Collect we pray to obtain forgiveness: “Grant unto Thy faithful people pardon and peace, we
beseech Thee, merciful Lord.” In the Epistle (Eph 5,15-21) St. Paul counsels us to use the time that remains to us in the best possible way, to attain eternal glory. “See, therefore, brethren, how you walk circumspectly, not as unwise, but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil.” The Apostle then explains what the nature of our wisdom should be: “Become not unwise, but understand what the will of God is.”

It would be the height of folly and imprudence to go through life following our own whims and desires. This is a most dangerous way and one which will never lead us to our destination. The only road that takes us to our eternal home is that of the will of God. Anyone who sincerely seeks God’s will and follows it, will be guided, not by his own spirit, but by God’s Spirit, the Holy Spirit, and can be sure that he will not go astray. “Be ye filled with the Holy Spirit,” exhorts St. Paul, “speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual canticles, singing and making melody in your hearts to the Lord...being subject one to another.” When a soul allows itself, with childlike docility, to be led by the Holy Spirit, He takes complete possession of it, filling it entirely with Himself; and from this plenitude, the spirit of prayer, virtue, humble submission and fraternal love spontaneously blossoms forth. To follow God’s will under the direction of the Holy Spirit is the quickest and safest way of reaching our heavenly home.


2. It is impossible to discover and walk in the way of God’s will without faith; today’s Gospel (Jn 4,46-53) expressly treats of this faith and the qualities it must have in order to be pleasing to God. A certain ruler, having heard of the marvelous cures performed by Jesus, went to Him and begged Jesus to come to his house and “heal his son, for he was at the point of death.” This man had faith in the miraculous power of the Master, but he was far from believing that He was the Son of God. Jesus knew this and replied: “Unless you see
signs and wonders, you believe not.” These words, which historically were addressed to the ruler and his companions, were meant for all whose faith depends on what they see and hear. There are very few who believe with simplicity in the Gospel, in Revelation, in the teachings of the Church; most people remain indifferent and are moved only in the presence of something unusual which strikes their senses. It is true that the Lord can use such things to help our weakness, but this is not the faith which pleases Him. “Blessed are they that have not seen and have believed ” (ibid. 20,29), He said to Thomas, who would not believe unless he saw the place of the nails and put his finger into His wounds. True faith is not based on our experience, on what we see and touch, but on the authority of God. God has revealed Himself; He can neither deceive nor be deceived; and we believe firmly on His word. To believe on the word of God is supernatural faith, the pure faith which is pleasing to God.

Jesus, who wished to lead the ruler to this true faith, said to him: “‘Go thy way, thy son liveth.” The man believed the word which Jesus said to him, and went his way.” It was not yet supernatural faith in the Son of God; nevertheless, it was an act of faith in the Master’s word, and although it was imperfect, it brought forth fruit: his son was cured. God does not demand more than each one can give Him, and when He sees our good will, our sincere efforts, He Himself intervenes to perfect the work. Thus the ruler’s imperfect and still human faith was rewarded by his son’s cure, and as a result, his faith became supernatural. He believed in Jesus, no longer as a simple prophet or wonder-worker, but as the Son of God; “and himself believed and his whole house.” In this life we walk toward God, not by vision, but by faith. The purer our faith is and the more free from human elements, the more pleasing it will be to God, and the more it will enable us to know His holy will and to accomplish it with love.


COLLOQUY

“Be propitious to Your children, O divine Master, Father and Lord. Grant that we who keep Your commandments may reflect Your image; may we experience, according to our strength, Your goodness, and not the severity of Your judgment.

“Grant that we may all live in Your peace and be admitted to Your kingdom after struggling against the waves of sin without being shipwrecked. In great tranquility, may we be drawn by the Holy Spirit, Your ineffable Wisdom, and guided by Him day and night, unto the perfect day. Grant that, until our last hour, we may be grateful in prayer and prayerful in gratitude to the one Father and Son, Son and Father, the Son our Teacher and Master, together with the Holy Spirit ” (Clement of Alexandria).

“Lord, You know what is best; let this or that be done as You will. Give what You will, as much as You will, and when You will. Do with me as You know best, as will most please You, and will be for Your greater honor. Put me where You will, and do with me in all things according to Your will. Lo, I am Your servant, ready to obey You in all things; for I do not desire to live for myself, but for You: Oh, that I could do so in a faithful and perfect manner!

“O most loving Jesus, grant me always to will and desire that which is most acceptable to You, and which pleases You best. Let Your will be mine, and let my will always follow Yours, and agree perfectly with it. Let my will be one with Yours in willing and in not willing, and let me be unable to will or not will anything but what You will or do not will” (Imit. IIT, 15,2.3).

330. THE FORMATION OF APOSTLES

PRESENCE OF GOD - Jesus, divine Teacher, deign to accept me in Your school, so that, under Your direction, I may prepare myself for the apostolate.


MEDITATION

1. No special preparation is necessary before giving oneself to the interior apostolate, for, if a soul dedicates itself to prayer and sacrifice, not only will it help others, but at the same time it will draw great profit for its own sanctification. In fact, the practice of the interior apostolate coincides perfectly with the fundamental exercises of the spiritual life. However, the same cannot be said of the external apostolate which, by its very nature, involves cares and occupations beyond those required for one’s personal progress. One who is just setting out in the spiritual life is not capable of attending to his own sanctification and the sanctification of others simultaneously; he should first have time to concentrate all his powers on his own spiritual formation. Furthermore, since the effectiveness of the apostolate corresponds to the degree of love and union with God which the apostle has attained, it is evident that a beginner will not be capable of exercising a very fruitful apostolate. Hence, if he engages in the active apostolate prematurely, he will dissipate his energy uselessly, with consequent harm to his own interior life and to the fruitfulness of his apostolate.

Jesus Himself spent thirty years in prayer and retirement although, being God, He had no need to do so. It was as if He wanted to show us that before we plunge into the work of the exterior apostolate, we must have reached a certain spiritual maturity by the exercise of the interior life. He treated the Apostles in a similar way : the three years they spent with Jesus were years of true formation for them. Our Lord instructed and admonished them, taught them how to pray and to practice virtue. Only occasionally, and then with precaution, did He entrust some mission to them, in order to give them experience. Finally, before He sent them out to conquer the world, He wished to strengthen their spirit by nourishing them with His Body, calling them to witness His Passion, and reuniting them in the Cenacle to await the coming of the Holy Spirit. Thus true Catholic tradition demands that, before apostles go out into the field of battle, they must prepare themselves by the practice of an intense interior life, which will make them qualified, fruitful instruments for the good of souls.


2. The great necessity for apostolic works, which is growing in urgency today, cannot justify a hasty preparation for the apostolate. What advantage would it be to send a greater number of apostles into the fray if, from lack of formation, they would not only be incapable of making any headway, but could not even withstand the attacks of the enemy? Enthusiasm and good will are not enough. A vigorous interior life, maturity of thought and judgment, and a spirit of sacrifice and union with God are also necessary; if these are wanting, no good will be accomplished, and the spiritual life of the apostles themselves will be endangered. The urgency of the apostolate must be answered by intensifying the formation of those who are to dedicate themselves to it, because only souls who are firmly anchored in God by an intense interior life will be able to withstand the constant pressure of external activity, and to vivify this activity with the fire of love.

St. Teresa of Jesus says, “A single one who is perfect will do more than many who are not” (Way, 3). It is, therefore, of the greatest importance that those who give themselves to the apostolate strive earnestly for perfection and sanctity, for only thus can they give God to souls and bring souls to God. The entire history of the Church is a practical demonstration of this principle: “St. Paul was only one, yet how many he attracted!... If all Christians were like St. Paul, how many worlds would be converted!” (St. John Chrysostom). The holy Curé of Ars had very few human resources, yet he converted an immense number of souls by the power of his own holiness, love, and union with God.

The pressing demands of the external apostolate focus our attention more than ever upon the need of well-formed apostles, apostles of deep interior life, saintly apostles. Therefore, even when the formative period has ended, we must always take care that external activity in no way diminishes our interior life. It is necessary to continually maintain the balance between prayer and work in such a way that we do not exhaust our spiritual energies, but allow sufficient time to renew them, to revive and to sustain our intimate contact with God.


COLLOQUY


“O Lord, my whole yearning is that, as You have so many enemies and so few friends, these last should be trusty ones. Therefore I am determined to do the little that is in me: namely, to follow the evangelical counsels as perfectly as I can, and...to pray for those who are defenders of the Church, and for the preachers and learned men who defend her. O Lord, since I am not strong enough to defend Your Church myself, I want to strive to live in such a way that my prayers may be of avail to help these servants of Yours, who, at the cost of so much toil, have armed themselves with learning and virtue and have labored to defend your Name.

“O my God, I wish to try to live in such a way as to be worthy to obtain two things from You: first, that there may be many of these very learned and religious men who have the qualifications for their task, and that You may prepare those who are not completely prepared already; for a single one who is perfect will do more than many who are not. Secondly, that, after they have entered upon this struggle, You may have them in Your hand so that they may be delivered from all the dangers that are in the world, and, while sailing on this perilous sea, may shut their ears to the song of the sirens. If I can prevail with You, my God, in the smallest degree about this, I shall be fighting Your battle even while living a cloistered life.

“I beseech Your Majesty to hear me in this; miserable creature that I am, I shall never cease to beg You for this, since it is for Your glory and the good of Your Church, and on these my desires are set. The day that my prayers, desires, disciplines and fasts are not performed for the intentions of which I have spoken, I shall not have fulfilled the object for which You, O Lord, called me to the contemplative life” (cf. T.J. Way, 1 - 3).

331. SANCTIFICATION IN THE APOSTOLATE

PRESENCE OF GOD - Give me light, O God, that I may recognize the graces You have prepared for me to lead me to sanctity; help me to correspond with them.


MEDITATION

1. It is the saints who are the most efficient apostles. Must we then be saints before devoting ourselves to the apostolate? Theoretically, this is the ideal, but in practice, it is impossible. To think that the formative years—those spent in the seminary or novitiate, for example—suffice to make us saints is a misconception. It is equally wrong to exempt ourselves from apostolic work, when charity or our duty imposes it on us, under the pretext that we have not yet arrived at sanctity. We must therefore conclude that when the period allotted exclusively to preparation is over, we must combine our own personal efforts toward sanctity with the exercise of the active apostolate. In other words, apostles must sanctify themselves in the apostolate and by means of it. “To sanctify yourself in view of and by means of the apostolate: these should be the marching orders of a diocesan priest.... We would be giving the lie to the Church, to the life of Jesus, and the lives of all the saints, if we said that the exterior apostolate is incompatible with personal sanctity.” These words, spoken by the servant of God, Don Poppe, to priests, are equally true for all apostles, cleric or lay, religious or secular. Every apostle should be convinced that precisely in his own field of labor—and nowhere else—will he find all the graces necessary to sanctify himself, to attain intimate union with God. When a person gives himself to the apostolate, not by his own choice, nor because of a natural attraction for activity, but solely in answer to a call from God, he can be certain that, since God has willed him to engage in the apostolate, and as He also wills him to be a saint, that the apostolate will provide him with the means to become one. God cannot condemn to mediocrity one who, in order to do His will, and out of love for Him, is burdened with apostolic labors and responsibilities.

“No, brethren,” Don Poppe continues, “the active life is not a night in which the light of the ideal is extinguished. If so many apostles have lost their light, you should not lose confidence, but humble yourselves profoundly because of your weakness, and then more abundant grace will surely bring you success. Do you not know that difficulties and obstacles are sometimes transformed into helps under the wonderful action of grace, and may contribute greatly to good? ‘Certus sum,’ you can say with St. Paul: I am certain that no creature in the world has the power to draw me away from the road to sanctity.” In the measure that an apostle is docile and faithful to grace, God will purify him, refine him, and sanctify him, precisely by means of his apostolic labors.

2. The conviction that we can sanctify ourselves in the midst of our work does not prevent us from having that silent longing for recollection, that desire for solitude and intimacy with God which often accompanies an apostle in his activities, becoming so keen at times that it casts a veil of nostalgia over his life. Anyone who has tasted, even in a slight degree, the infinite beauty and goodness of God, cannot fail to experience an overwhelming longing and need for Him. This is a good sign: it means that the apostle has not permitted himself to be pervaded and distracted by exterior occupations, and that, although living in the world, he is not of the world, but really tends toward God. Even if this longing should at times become painful, the apostle must not be disturbed nor believe that he has mistaken his way. ‘This pain will purify him and lead him to God. Moreover, he should not think that the mere desire for deeper recollection and union with God necessarily indicates a call to the contemplative life, which is characterized especially by the need of a radical dedication and self-immolation. An insistent call to a deeper interior life should be considered rather as a grace given to protect the apostle against the dangers of the exterior life. It is the bulwark, the enclosure wall of his spiritual life.

However, the desire for God should be satisfied; in addition to the daily hours of prayer and silence, the apostle must have sufficient pauses in his work. Monthly and yearly retreats are indispensable, and even more leisure for recollection must be taken after periods of intense activity. It would be a fatal error to allow oneself to become so absorbed in work that time could no longer be found for concentration on God in intimate heart-to-heart conversation with Him. Not even from the standpoint of greater generosity should an apostle renounce his hours of prayer.

But at the same time, he must go to his work calmly and confidently, ever mindful of the fact that, until he has attained to full maturity in the spiritual life, he will not be able to escape the conflict between action and contemplation: action which tries to draw him away from contemplation, and contemplation which would like to prolong itself beyond the appointed time. He must make every effort to maintain an equilibrium, avoiding both extremes, and unifying his life by means of love. Before the conflict is settled in perfect harmony, a long road must be traversed, where it is absolutely necessary to give oneself to activity with great prudence, and to be very faithful to prayer, being careful not to allow the time allotted for it to be encroached upon.


COLLOQUY

“O my God, how few saintly apostles there are! How rare are Your real friends! O Lord, I am on fire with longing for the coming of Your kingdom in the souls of apostles; I am on fire, but I am so poor that I shall be consumed before this kingdom comes!

“O Lord, make me a holy apostle, because a saint can accomplish more with one word than an ordinary worker can with a whole series of speeches. Without sanctity, I am like sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal, and You, O God, speak only through the mouths of the saints. Give me sanctity then, as it alone can enlighten minds, move hearts, and renew them. O my God, do not permit me to deal in tinsel or to be an empty vessel!

“It is hard to sanctify oneself in the apostolate; there are many obstacles and dangers to be encountered. Shall I then retire in discouragement? No, my God, because if my will is good, I shall always be aided by Your grace, and where there is grace, the way which leads to the end, to sanctity, will always be found! Then what have I to fear? Your grace is with me; You Yourself are with me and in me. And if You, O God, enter the battle with me, what can I call an obstacle? Would it be tribulation or sorrow, hunger or nakedness, danger, persecution, or the sword? I shall overcome all these difficulties with Your help, for You love me, and will not abandon me. Leaning on You, O Lord, I am certain that nothing in the world has the power to separate me from the way of sanctity. I am certain because You want apostles to be saints, because You are infinitely good, infinitely powerful, and faithful to Your promises, and because You are infinitely merciful ” (Don Poppe).

332. A RIGHT INTENTION

PRESENCE OF GOD - O God, remove from my heart all secondary intentions and all movements of self-love, so that I may seek only Your glory.


MEDITATION

1. Difficulties encountered in the apostolate often arise because apostolic activity is not exercised under conditions which are required by its very nature, conditions which are indispensable if this activity is to be transformed into an intense exercise of the spiritual life. There is question here of a certain disorder, arising from the more or less natural motives which insinuate themselves into the work and cause it to descend from the supernatural to the natural level. Thus it becomes an occasion for deviation and lukewarmness in the interior life, which in turn, makes the soul feel dissatisfied and uneasy. Pope Pius XII, in his Motu proprio Primo Feliciter, expressed very clearly the necessary conditions for a holy activity. He said : “ The apostolate should always be exercised in a saintly manner, with such purity of intention, such interior union with God, such generous forgetfulness and abnegation of self, and with so great a love for souls that it [the apostolate] flows from the interior spirit which informs it and at the same time nourishes and renews this same spirit.” Examining our apostolate in the light of these words, we shall be able to detect its weak points, to discover the defects to be avoided and the remedies to be applied. There are four conditions proposed: purity of intention, union with God, self-abnegation, love for souls. They are so important that while guaranteeing a fruitful apostolate, they constitute an efficacious means of spiritual progress. Striving to realize them, we shall simultaneously raise the level of our activity and of our interior life.

Let us first consider purity of intention. If no one can “serve God and Mammon” (Mt 6,24), much less can the apostle give himself to apostolic works with the double intention of serving God and his own self-love, of pleasing God and the world, of being zealous for the interests of souls and for his own personal interests. Strength, peace, and life come from unity; dividing one’s forces especially in the realm of the spirit, can only lead to weakness, conflict, and ultimately to death. An apostle whose heart is torn between opposing intentions will look in vain for peace in his work; he will always be disturbed and dissatisfied.


2. There can be a lack of right intention in a way that easily escapes one’s notice; it may be so subtle that to a distracted soul, it passes wholly unobserved. In order to discover the least secondary intentions which, like little foxes, creep in secretly to destroy apostolic activity, an atmosphere of recollection and prayer is necessary. In his moments of quiet at the feet of Our Lord, the apostle will discover that often, in the course of his daily occupations, he loses sight of the supernatural end which should animate his activity, and that in its place secondary ends appear, becoming the immediate motive of many of his decisions and acts. This means that his intention has not remained directed solely toward God and souls, but has often deviated under the influence of self-love. Sometimes it is a question of seeking praise and glory, more or less unconsciously, or it may be preoccupations concerning his personal advantage or material interests: keeping a position, obtaining some promotion, being favored by superiors, or selected for more attractive or remunerative work.... In short, the apostle should realize that, side by side with his love for God and souls there is still much self-love and egoism. This is not a very consoling picture, but he should not be discouraged by it; instead, he should humbly recognize his own misery and thank God who has revealed it to him in order that he may correct it. On the other hand, he must not think that everything he does is merely the fruit of pride. No, when a person has consecrated himself to the apostolate with a sincere desire of doing God’s will and winning other hearts for Him, he should acknowledge that he is animated by love for God and souls, but that his love is not strong enough yet to triumph completely over human passions. Therefore, the apostle should not give up the struggle against the manifestations of self-love, no matter how trivial. He must not yield to them under the pretext that they are natural tendencies, but must correct, mortify, repress, and cut them off without pity, and must always rectify his intentions.

A long, thorough purification is necessary to overcome completely the dualism between God and “ self,” between love for souls and love of self. The apostle must ask Our Lord for the grace of this total purification and dispose himself to receive it, profiting by every occasion for detachment, renunciation, sacrifice, and humiliation, which apostolic activity offers in abundance to all who seriously dedicate themselves to it. If the apostle does this, he will find in his work an excellent means of spiritual progress, and instead of becoming entangled in the dangers which abound in external activity when self-love is not mortified, he will be purified by the very exercise of his apostolate.


COLLOQUY

“When I desire to pray or work for the good of others, I must first of all turn the eyes of my mind toward You, O eternal Light, and to Your splendor, so that You will give me light, strengthen my spirit, and help me to withdraw, as much as possible, from external things in order to turn wholly toward that which is interior. Grant that I may see only the interior man in my neighbor, paying attention to the exterior only insofar as it helps the interior, so that everything else will be put aside as vanity and I may not be attracted by vain things.

“O my God, grant that I may be drawn to the apostolate, to prayer, and to giving good example, not by vainglory, ambition, human complacency, or any worldly interest, but only by the desire to save souls. You alone, O my crucified Christ, do I wish to seek! I want to inebriate souls with Your Blood, and not with vain curiosities, in order that they may desire You alone. I would say to each one of them, ‘I know only Jesus Christ and Him crucified.’ Hence I not only have no desire of worldly advantages or of being pleasing to men; I do not even judge myself as knowing anyone or anything but You, Christ crucified.

“O Lord, inebriate me so thoroughly with Your love that, if anything else but You presents itself to my sight or taste, to my hearing or any other sense, I shall consider it as nothing, so much so that I shall not take my delight, nor my glory, nor my rest except in Your Precious Blood, toward which I desire to be completely turned. Grant that my eyes may not be filled with the things of earth, but only with Your sufferings; grant that my mouth may not be filled with vain words, but with what concerns Your Passion, and may it be the same with all my other senses ” (cf. St. Bonaventure).

333. SELF-FORGETFULNESS AND ABNEGATION

PRESENCE OF GOD - O Lord, You who give Yourself to us even to becoming our food, teach me to give myself to souls even unto total forgetfulness of myself.


MEDITATION

1. Another condition necessary for making our activity holy is “generous forgetfulness and abnegation of self” (Pius XII); what is more, without forgetfulness of self, it would be impossible to have rectitude of intention. Many secondary intentions steal into our actions precisely because we are so wrapt up in ourselves, so occupied and preoccupied with our ego, our interests, our conveniences, so anxious to be admired and to win applause and esteem. “We must go forth from ourselves and from creatures,” says St. John of the Cross, go forth especially from this creature whom we love more than every other, ourself. If the Saint indicates to us the way of “ the nothing” with a view to the contemplative ideal of union with God, we may assert that the apostolic life does not require less; it too exacts total abnegation of self which can only be brought about by constantly reminding ourselves : nothing, nothing, nothing.

To realize his vocation, the missionary must leave his homeland, his parents, his friends; he must give up the language, habits, and customs of his country in order to conform to those of his adopted land; likewise, due proportion being made, every apostle must renounce many things, even when working in home surroundings, his place of employment, or among his neighbors. Tastes, habits, personal demands of culture, education, sensibility must be generously put aside, that the apostle may adapt himself to the mentality and to the demands of others; quiet, rest, relaxation, must yield their place to the service of souls. The apostle should not go about seeking interesting conversations, consoling friendships, pleasant occupations, satisfying results. Occasionally it may happen that he will meet these things on his way, but even then, he may not stop to enjoy them selfishly, but must use them as means for the apostolate; in any case, they may never and must never rule his activity. The apostle is sent to “give” and not to “receive,” to sow and not to reap; therefore, he ought to know how to give his time, his work, his energies, and his very self, even in situations which offer nothing consoling, and even to those souls from whom he receives neither satisfaction nor gratitude.


2. St. Paul teaches that the priest “is ordained for men” (Heb 5,1), and the same can be said of every apostle. The apostle does not exist for himself, for his career, for his own advantage, but for souls, for the advantage of others and for all that concerns their spiritual good. Even if the apostolate confers on him some authority, some dignity, it is not for his honor, for his utility, but only for the service of his fellow men. The only personal advantage that he can and should derive from the exercise of his apostolate is his own sanctification. Such is the only right that the apostle is entitled to, the sole benefit he can seek for himself; all the rest must be generously sacrificed for God and for souls.

A soul truly given to the apostolate no longer belongs to himself: his strength, his talents, his time, his health, his life belong to God and his neighbor, and having given himself, he can no longer take himself back, nor dispose of himself. It can be said that he has lost the right of ownership over all that he is and all that he has. To give himself by forgetting himself, and to forget himself that he may give himself even more: such is his program; and this, not only in moments of enthusiasm, on bright days, when souls respond to his care, when his works flourish, and he himself is strong and vigorous, but also in moments of darkness, on gray days, when all seems to crumble under the impact of difficulties, when his tired body claims a little rest, when the work is heavy and energy declines and, with the onrush of internal and external struggles, it becomes very difficult to remain at his post.

Yes, even in hours of abandonment and trial, the apostle must continue to give himself with equal constancy and generosity. If he does not do so cheerfully, that is, with a true spirit of sacrifice, it will be impossible for his conduct not to betray his ill humor, discontent, aversion, or impatience; and all this is very prejudicial to his work and the influence he could exercise. But where can the strength be found for this complete and continual gift of self? In the Holy Eucharist. In it, Jesus gives Himself to us even to becoming our food. If the apostle, called to extend the mission of the Master, cannot imitate Him by giving himself literally as food to souls, he can nevertheless follow His example by putting himself at their disposal to the point of allowing himself to be “ eaten” by them, that is to say, by allowing himself to be consumed in their service.


COLLOQUY

“O Lord, help me to understand well that my work has eternal value only in proportion to the love with which I do it, and not to the success or failure it may or may not have. Even if I do not see the fruits, what does it matter as long as You see them? You want me to work in the spirit of faith, without seeking personal satisfaction.

“I feel that I am a mother of souls, and I must sacrifice myself for them with the greatest generosity because the salvation of many souls may depend on my correspondence to grace. I am a poor little nothing, Lord, but I offer You all. Father, I offer You Your divine Son. Take me and dispose of me for Your greatest glory.

“O Lord, with insistence You are constantly urging me to an ever more generous and total sacrifice. I feel the need to give myself to You, no longer to reserve anything for myself. I wish, then, to renew my offering to You in order that You may take me wholly, that You may transform me, that You may use me for Your glory, for the salvation of souls, and that You may complete in me what is lacking to Your Passion for Your Body which is the Church. I am happy to find so many practical occasions in the course of my day to realize this offering” (Sr. Carmela of the Holy Spirit, O.C.D.).

“O Jesus, my whole strength lies in prayer and sacrifice: these are my invincible weapons, and experience has taught me that the heart is won by them rather than by words” (T.C.J. St, 11).

334. HUMILITY IN THE APOSTOLATE

PRESENCE OF GOD - Impress in me such a deep sense of my poverty, O Lord, that I may look to You for everything and attribute to You, to You alone, all that is good.


MEDITATION

1. Humility is the indispensable foundation of the whole spiritual life; hence it is the basic condition of every apostolate and constitutes the principal part of the program of abnegation and forgetfulness of self which the apostolate requires. Because the apostle is placed, as it were, on a candlestick, he needs more than others to protect himself from pride and vainglory by a deep humility. In glancing through the Gospels, it is significant to note how much Jesus insisted on this point relative to the training of His Apostles. While they were debating among themselves who would be the greatest in the messianic kingdom, the Master answered: “Unless you be converted and become as little children, You shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven” (Mt 18,3). On another occasion, when the mother of James and John asked the first places for her sons, Jesus replied: “He that will be first among you shall be your servant” (ibid. 20,27). And on the evening of the Last Supper, while washing the feet of the Apostles, He showed them to what extent they should make themselves servants: “If then, I, being your Lord and Master, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet ” (Jn 13,14). Finally, before sending them into His vineyard to bear “much fruit,” He repeatedly told them, “Without Me you can do nothing” (ibid. 15,5). Yes, the apostle is the friend of Jesus, chosen by Him and destined to evangelize the world. Some have been appointed by Him to govern the Church, clothed with the dignity of the priesthood, with the power “to loose and to bind.”

All—cleric or lay—have been elevated to the dignity of collaborators with the Hierarchy in the work of saving souls. But at the base of all these privileges, all these honors, are found the great words: “You must become as little children.... Without Me you can do nothing.” Oh! If we were truly convinced that, although God may will to make use of us, He alone possesses the power to make our action fruitful, He alone can produce fruits of eternal life, He alone can give grace to souls, and we are nothing but instruments! In fact, the smaller we make ourselves by acknowledging our poverty, the more qualified we become to be used as a means for the salvation of others. What glory can a brush claim if a skillful artist uses it to perfect a work of art? Can the marble used by Michelangelo to sculpture his Moses boast of any merit? “You have not chosen Me,” Jesus said to His Apostles, "but I have chosen you; and have appointed you, that you should go and should bring forth fruit” (Jn 15,16).

2. “Without Me you can do nothing.” How many ambitions and points of honor, how much vain self-complacency, how many desires for applause and for advancement in recognition of our personal worth are broken, like waves on the rocks, by these words! Jesus does not tell us that “without Him we can do little,” but, nothing, absolutely nothing, and if in appearance the works flourish, admirers increase, churches and halls are filled, in reality not the least atom of grace can descend into hearts if God does not intervene.

Poor apostle, at times so satisfied, so inflated by success! Despite your abilities, your talent, your brilliant style, your attractive conversation, your titles, your successes—in relation to the apostolate, you are smaller and more powerless than an ant before a very high mountain. Recognize your nothingness, take refuge in God, keep yourself closely united to Him, for only from Him will you draw the fruitfulness of your works.

Charged with the education of the novices, St. Thérése of the Child Jesus exclaimed: “You see, Lord, that I am too small to feed Your little ones, but if through me You wish to give to each what is suitable, then fill my hands, and without leaving the shelter of Your arms, or even turning my head, I will distribute Your treasures to the souls who come to me asking for food” (St 11). Such should be the attitude of every apostle; and what is more, the higher his mission, the more important and delicate it is, the more necessary is this humble consciousness of his personal misery, this confident recourse to God, this constant union with Him. If God does not use us to accomplish great works, is it because, being insufficiently convinced of our nothingness, we would take to ourselves the glory due to Him alone, attributing our success to our own merits? If our apostolic activity produces few fruits, is it because, relying too much on ourselves, we do not constantly strive to keep close to God by means of humility and prayer? “Abide in Me,” Jesus repeats to us. “As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abide in the vine, so neither can you, unless you abide in Me” (Jn 15,4). It does not suffice for the apostle to be united to Jesus through the state of grace; he must remain united to Him, plunged in profound humility which makes him realize that he can do nothing, absolutely nothing, without continual help.


COLLOQUY

“O Lord, You wish that in my apostolate I may feel and recognize my nothingness, but at the same time You want me to let myself be taken and carried by You to accomplish the mission that You confide to me, and then enter again into obscurity and silence, boasting of nothing and saying only: ‘servi inutiles sumus'; I am a useless servant, without You I can do nothing.

“O Lord, help me to flee praise and the applause of creatures; help me to act always with an upright intention, seeking only Your good pleasure. I beg You to put far from me those defects which could distract me from working only to please You: ostentation, compliments, adulation, the desire of making a good appearance, of being agreeable to others. Grant that I may never seek my glory but only yours. All to please You, nothing to satisfy myself” (Sr. Carmela of the Holy Spirit, O.C.D.).

“I beg You, Lord, to direct the heart and the will of Your apostles to Yourself so that they may follow You, immolated Lamb, poor, humble, and meek, by the way of the Holy Cross, in Your way and not in their way. Dispel the darkness of their hearts and give them Your light; take from them all self-love and kindle in them the fire of Your charity. Make them close the faculties of their souls, shutting their minds to vain delights and earthly benefits, leaving them open only to Your benefits, that they may love nothing outside of You, but love You above all things, and everything else according to Your will; may they follow You alone.

“Grant that, with well ordered charity, they may seek the salvation of all, disposing themselves to give their life for the good of souls. And may they be angelic creatures, earthly angels in this life, and burning lamps in the Holy Church!” (cf. St. Catherine of Siena).

335. HUMAN QUALITIES AND APOSTOLIC CHARITY

PRESENCE OF GOD - Melt my heart, Lord, in the flame of Your charity.


MEDITATION

1. The apostolate is the expression and the fruit of caritas apostolica, that is to say, of love of God and neighbor, which has increased until it has become zeal for souls. But besides this essential aspect of the charity which must animate the apostle, there are secondary aspects; we might almost say human ones, that are, nevertheless, of great importance, since they permit the apostle to exercise influence over souls. We here speak of such qualities as affability, thoughtfulness, courtesy, sociability, sincerity, understanding, which although human gifts in themselves, acquire supernatural value when elevated by grace and placed at the service of the apostolate. It is a matter, in substance, of those qualities which St. Paul attributes to love: “Charity is patient, is kind.. .is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil. . .rejoiceth with the truth” (1 Cor 13,4-6).

It is not sufficient to love souls in the secret of our heart, working and sacrificing ourselves for them; this love must also be manifested exteriorly by an agreeable and pleasant manner, in such a way that those who approach us may feel themselves loved, and consequently encouraged to confidence and to trust. A rude, brusque, or impatient manner might cause some to go away offended, and perhaps, even scandalized. The apostle may well have a heart of gold, rich in charity and zeal, but if he maintains a rough and sharp exterior, he closes access to souls, and considerably diminishes the good he could realize. The saints, while being very supernatural, never neglected these human qualities of charity. St. Francis de Sales liked to say that, as more flies are attracted with a drop of honey than with a barrel of vinegar, so more hearts are conquered by a little sweetness than by rough manners. And St. Teresa of Jesus, who wished her daughters to be united by the bond of pure supernatural charity, did not believe it superfluous to make recommendations of this kind: “The holier you are, the more sociable you should be with your sisters. Although you may be sorry if all your sisters’ conversation is not just as you would like it to be, never keep aloof from them if you wish to help them and to have their love. We must try hard to be pleasant, and to humor the people we deal with” (Way, 41). This is very useful advice for anyone who wishes to win souls for God.


2. Concerning natural qualities employed in the service of apostolic charity, we can meditate fruitfully on the exhortation addressed by Pius XII to a group of religious men: “Before the young religious (and this could be said of the apostle) becomes a shining example, let him study to become a perfect man in the ordinary everyday things.... Let him learn, then, and show by his works, the dignity proper to human nature and to society; let him regulate his countenance and bearing in a dignified manner and be faithful and sincere; let him keep his promises; let him govern his acts and his words; let him have respect for all and not harm the rights of others; let him endure evil and be sociable.... As you well know, the virtues called natural are raised to the dignity of the supernatural life chiefly when a man practises them and cultivates them in order to become a good Christian and a worthy herald and minister of Christ” (September, 1951). There is, therefore, no reason to believe that an antagonism exists between the plenitude of the supernatural life, union with God,
and the plenitude of human virtue, deriving from a right development of the natural virtues. We must remember that grace does not destroy nature, but elevates it. The struggle against nature making way for grace, tends to mortify and to destroy only what is defective in nature, leaving intact the good qualities and powers to be raised and transferred to the supernatural plane. Grace, and consequently the Christian life, greatly respects and uses all human values; moreover, how could we believe that the supernatural destroys nature when the latter, no less than the former, is the work of God, the fruit of His wisdom and of His infinite goodness?

In raising man to the supernatural plane, God did not intend to destroy in him what had already been created, but only to sublimate and to elevate it. In the light of these principles, we understand why it has been said that the apostle, as well as the priest, must be a “perfect gentleman” (Cardinal Newman). We also grasp why the saints are the more perfect men, in the sense that they have carried the natural virtues to their highest perfection and sublimation. It follows that the saints are more capable than others of surrounding men with amiability, delicacy, and understanding, while loving them with a purely supernatural love; thus they more easily win their hearts. This perfect courtesy, ever self-possessed, even with the importunate, and even in moments of weariness, can only flow from great supernatural virtue and delicate charity.


COLLOQUY

"O Lord, “if I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal...if I should have the gift of prophecy and should know all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I should have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And if I should distribute all my goods to feed the poor, and if I should deliver my body to be burned, and have not charity, it would profit me nothing.

“Grant me charity, then, O my God, for charity is patient, is kind: charity envieth not, dealeth not perversely; is not puffed up; is not ambitious, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh no evil; rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth with the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things” (cf. 1 Cor 13,1-7).

"Grant, O Lord, that in consecrating myself to Your service, my tenderness toward my neighbor may not diminish, but may grow in my heart, and may become ever more pure, more supernatural. Teach me to love tenderly all who draw near to me. Make me gentle, affable, agreeable, not to attract to myself the affection of creatures, but to conquer their hearts for You.

"O Jesus, if the apostle should be a copy of You, not only in broad lines, but even in details, how shall I be such if I do not try to imitate the gentleness of Your heart? O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto Yours."