My Daily Bread

[Hildegard of Bingen]

MY DAILY BREAD

A Summary of the Spiritual Life
Simplified and Arranged
for Daily Reading,

Reflection and Prayer

By

Anthony J. Paone, S.J.
1954



Contents

Book One:
The Way of Purification
Conversion
After Conversion
Temptation
Conquering Bad Habits
Self-Conquest Through Mortification


Book Two:
The Way of Imitation
Following Jesus in Daily Life
Virtues Leading Directly to God
Man's Relation With His Neighbor and With Himself
The Spiritual Combat

Book Three:
The Way of Union
Striving For Closer Union
Union Through the Holy Eucharist
Union Throughout the Day

BOOK ONE:

The Way of Purification

PART ONE:

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 1
Man's Purpose on Earth

CHRIST: MY CHILD, the highest goal of your life is union with Me in Heaven. Let your
intentions throughout the day be guided by this truth. In all things be sure to stay on the
path which leads to Heaven. Do not become too deeply interested in the passing desires and
brief enjoyments of this earthly life.

2. I have given you everything that you are and everything you have. All things come to
you from Me, the Supreme Good. Whatever comes, accept it, use it, enjoy it, as I wish and
as much as I wish.

3. If you think only of satisfying yourself, without considering My approval, your mind
becomes confused and your will becomes weak. Mistakes and sins will rob you of peace on
earth and of unending happiness in Heaven. In all things, therefore, keep your eyes on Me.

4. Happy are those who desire only what I want, trying steadily to do My Will. Such people
do not let themselves become completely absorbed by their daily activities. They
frequently offer their activities to Me. They see the brevity of human contentment on earth.

5. Examine your motives in your daily words and actions. Find out how you may please
Me more, and avoid everything which may draw you away from Me.

THINK: I was created for eternal happiness with God in Heaven. Everything else must take
second place in my life, because if I lose Heaven, I will be losing everything. The sure
guide to Heaven is God's holy Will. If I follow it in my daily life,
every moment on earth will be a sure step toward the perfect happiness which my heart
craves.

PRAY: My God and loving Father, grant me the wisdom to think, speak, and act each day
as You want me to. May I never be such a fool as to disagree with Your supreme goodness
and wisdom. Nothing on earth can bring me any lasting happiness. Therefore, let me never
sin for the sake of anything. I want to live for the perfect happiness for which You created
me. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 2
The Purpose of Created Things

CHRIST: MY CHILD, if you directed your desires according to My Will, you would learn
many a holy lesson from the events of daily life. Nothing is so small and unimportant that it
does not, in some way, reflect my wisdom and goodness. When you have become as good
and unselfish as you should be, you will find it easy to understand the deeper meaning of
the events in your daily life. An unselfish heart sees much more than what appears on the
surface.

2. I created Heaven and earth for the service of man. I have even appointed angels to help
man. In fact, I Myself am continually serving and helping man. If he lives as I desire, he
shall one day share with Me the perfect happiness of Heaven.
3. What are you doing in return for My numberless favors? You should serve Me every
single day of your life. Yet, you fail to give Me unselfish service even for one single day. I
deserve all possible obedience, all possible honor and eternal praise. To Me you owe each
breath and second of life. Without My continued support, nothing could please nor help
you. All assistance and relief is the work of My hand.

THINK:
If I ever wrote down a list of God's gifts to me, I would have to compose a book.
Everything and everybody, whatever I may mention, is a gift of God for a definite purpose.
All things, not just some things, are in my life for God's good reasons. In one way or
another, they are meant to help me earn the unending happiness and glory of Heaven. I
must reject any person or thing that leads me away from this goal by sin. All things are to
be used wisely, that is, to help me live a good and useful life. By an intelligent use and
control of life's daily needs and activities, I prove my sincere desire for God's eternal love
and friendship in Heaven.

PRAY:
My God, the good things that attract me on earth are only tiny reflections of Your perfect
attraction and goodness. Let them never turn my thoughts aside from You, the Perfect
Good. I hope to turn away from anybody or anything which draws me away from You. The
good things of earth will pass away all too soon, but You will remain forever. I choose You
now by a sincere daily battle against sin. Grant me the glorious favor of pleasing You on
earth and loving You in Heaven. Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 3

A Right Intention in All Things


CHRIST: MY CHILD, in all things I want you to have a right intention. That means that I
want you to have a supernatural purpose in whatever you think, do, or say. Whether you
seek to avoid hell, diminish your purgatory, or gain Heaven, such motives are supernatural,
and therefore they are right intentions. True, you are often unaware of your motives, but as
long as you are not in mortal sin, and your action agrees with My law, you have a right
intention.

2. A right intention, however, may have different degrees of perfection. Thus, when you do
something simply to please Me, your intention is higher than if you think of your own
advantage. Still, whatever be the degree of your right intention, it always seeks to fulfill
My Will, and it always brings you a greater good than any intention which seeks only your
earthly welfare.

3. Regardless of feelings, moods, prejudices, or preferences, strive to maintain a right
intention at all times. As soon as your natural desires contradict My Will, check them as
you would check any other foolish intention.

4. Do not let life's daily events disturb nor affect you too much. Seek to know My Will and
to accept it in all things. With this pure intention, you will have a deep interior peace. This
is My gift to those who let Me govern their lives.

5. A person's intention tends to become dim as he proceeds through his daily occupations.
Gradually he is influenced more by pleasure or self-satisfaction. Therefore, renew your
pure intention at different times during the day. Offer Me each activity and avoid anything
which might lead you into sin.

6. Recall your heavenly goal from time to time. Let there be nothing great, nothing high,
nothing pleasant, nothing acceptable to you unless it helps you to follow My Will. Consider
all useless consolations and sinful pleasures as so much worthless money.
7. One who truly loves Me, hates everything which holds him back from Me. I alone, the
eternal, infinite God, the perfect joy of the soul, can bring true peace and unending
happiness to your heart.

THINK:
Where are the pleasures and joys of last year? Gone and forgotten. If they made me worse,
I shall find death and judgment a little harder to face. Why do I fail to value things
according to God's way of thinking? He wants me to live a sinless and useful life. Even my
pleasures should improve me in some way, and make me better able to do my work.
Heaven is far greater than I can ever deserve. Still I should try each day to be a little less
unworthy of it.

PRAY:
Lord, what You say is true. Grant that I may follow Your words in my daily life. Your truth
shall teach me, guide me, and protect me. May it deliver me from all evil desires and
foolish love. Let me esteem nothing as great, or valuable, or wonderful, except insofar as it
makes me better and more pleasing in Your eyes. In this way I shall never be a slave of this
earth, but shall walk daily towards Heaven with a holy freedom of heart. Amen.


CONVERSION



Chapter 4

Holy Indifference

CHRIST: MY CHILD, let Me do with you as I please. I know what is best for you. You
think as a human being, so that your judgments are often influenced by your feelings,
moods or prejudices.

2. I take better care of you than you could ever take of yourself. Anyone who does not give
Me his whole-hearted attention and loyalty, is taking a great risk. I alone can lead you to
eternal life. Let Me do with you as I please. Whatever I do will always be best for you.

3. Knowing all things, I know your most important needs. I want you to gain the perfect
and unending joy of Heaven. For this reason I will place you at times in a spiritual darkness
of doubts and confusion. Then again I will let you enjoy the light of My truth and joy. One
day I will console you, and on the next day you may find life hard and sorrowful. But
through all these changing conditions, remember that My hand is leading you on toward
Heaven.
4. Follow My Will in all things. Be just as ready to experience suffering as to have joy, just
as glad to be poor and needy as to be well off. If you prefer My Will in all these things, you
will be preferring the Perfect Wisdom and the Highest Good.

THINK:

God made me for the perfect life of Heaven. Whatever He sends me is sent with this goal
in view. Some things I can remedy and improve in my daily life, while other things are
beyond my control. After I have done my best, I should accept the results as God's Will for
me. Be it hard or easy, pleasant or disagreeable, I can always be sure that God knows,
wants and permits what is good for my soul.

PRAY:

My God and my All, You made and control all things in my daily life. How can I forget
this truth and complain about anything? Grant me the holy dispositions which you
mentioned a moment ago. Make me equally willing to receive from Your hand the sweet
and the bitter, the joy and the sorrow. I thank you now for whatever You decide to send
me. Only keep me from sin, and I shall fear neither death nor hell. As long as You do not
separate me from You forever, nor blot me out of the book of life, whatever suffering
comes to me will not hurt me for long. Grant me the grace to see, love, and prefer Your
Will in everything that happens to me today. Amen

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 5

Looking Away from God

CHRIST: MY CHILD, the person who esteems anything for itself alone, forgetting My
goodness and love, will always be small and inferior like the things which he values.
Whatever does not help you to please Me, has no true value in your life. You should
therefore consider it as nothing.

2. Unless you see Me in your daily life, you will sooner or later become discontented,
wherever you are and wherever you turn.

3. If any man tries to enjoy anything as though it were his alone, he will not have a lasting
joy nor true freedom. In many ways he will find himself tied down and shut off from Me.

4. He who thinks more of earthly things than he does of Me, will find nothing but
insecurity, trouble and sorrow. He may not realize it, but he is planning his own
destruction.

5. Be it ever so little, if anything is loved and valued more than it deserves, it holds you
back from Me, the Highest Good, and it weakens your soul. The man who looks only for
worldly satisfactions, becomes blind to the loving presence of his Creator.

THINK:
One who seeks only pleasure, ease, honor, or profit is a worldling, that is, he lives only for
this life. Gradually he becomes a slave of his earthly desires, so that he cannot even think
of God. He will believe in Heaven too late-when he finds its gates forever closed to him.

PRAY:
My God, I rely on Your assistance to keep myself free from the slavery of earthly
attractions. I shall use my possessions and daily enjoyments as things which You have lent
to me. May I never offend You with these gifts of Yours. As yesterday's enjoyments passed
away, so too will those of today. I want to live for the greatest Good-for You, my God and
my All. You alone are best and highest. Only You can satisfy my heart's longings forever.
Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 6

The Last and Highest Goal

CHRIST: MY CHILD, My true friends refuse to pursue things simply because they are
pleasant. They do not want anything which has only temporary value. All their hopes and
ambitions aim at the success which I give, the success which will never pass away. They
know that too much love for earthly things can draw them away from the only lasting joy
and glory. So in all their daily activities, they keep an eye on Me and My commandments.

2. Among all the wonders of heaven and earth, there is no one like Me. My works are
supremely good and My judgments are perfectly true. By My providence the universe is
ruled.

3. Let others seek whatever else they desire besides Me. As for you, let nothing please you
except Me alone, your Hope, your Eternal Salvation.

4. Daily look for Me above all things. Try to find Me in all things. I alone am the Giver of
true peace and lasting happiness.

THINK:
No tongue can describe the peace which God gives to those who sincerely want His Will
above all else. Many never find this peace because they lack the trust and courage to live
entirely God's way. They try to obey God's law only in part. God loves the man who is
honest enough to want first things first.

PRAY:
My loving Saviour and merciful God, can I be so foolish as to think that I can find
happiness without You? Can sin ever bring me true joy when it separates me from You, the
Fountain of lasting joy? No. I hope, with Your help to keep my eyes fixed on You
throughout my daily life. I hope to avoid whatever displeases You, and to live as You wish
me to live each hour of the day. Your Will shows the way to undying peace and happiness.
Let me love Your Will in all things. Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 7

Vanity in Daily Life

CHRIST: MY CHILD, vanity is another name for foolish expectation and for useless
pretense. Some people expect too much from the good things of this world. Others pretend
to be bigger than they really are and try to attract more attention than they deserve.

2. Vanity of vanities, and all is vanity for those who do not love Me, or refuse to follow My
commandments. Nothing is permanent under the sun. When you love anything for its own
sake, and not because it helps you do My Will, you are a victim of vanity. Death shall take
all these things away from you, and nothing will be left. How wise is the man who
appreciates this truth!

3. It is vanity to strive too intently for perishable riches and to fix your hopes on them. It is
vanity also to be over-eager for honors, or to consider your self better than others. It is
vanity to follow blindly the desires of the flesh and to want things which will bring a great
penalty later on.

4. It is vanity to wish for a long life while caring little about living a good life. It is vanity
to give your entire attention to the present life without thinking of the life which will come
later. It is vanity to love only what is speedily passing away, instead of fixing your heart on
Heaven the home of endless joy.

THINK:

If the dead could relive their lives, how differently many of them would value things I Now
they know how foolish are many things for which they lived, and worked, and even sinned.
The good, however, now enjoy perfect joy and happiness with God in Heaven because they
refused to offend Him for any worldly comfort or glory. My life is my choice. Will I try to
please God in all things, or will I prefer some earthly satisfaction against His holy Will?

PRAY:

Lord, grant me heavenly wisdom, so that I may learn to seek You above everything else.
May I find You, enjoy Your presence in my life, and love You above everything else. Let
me understand all things according to their importance in Your eyes. Grant that I may
prudently avoid the flatterer and patiently bear with those who make my life more difficult.
It is great wisdom to fight the undue influence of human words and to keep my eyes on
Your holy law. In this way I shall go safely onward along the way that leads to eternal life,
unending happiness, and the only lasting success. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 8

The Voice of Conscience

CHRIST: MY CHILD, refuse to do wrong for anything in the world. It is better to have the
whole world against you rather than have Me against you. Whoever loses Me, is losing
more than the entire world. Whatever you love on earth is but a reflection of My goodness.
If you fix your attention and interest only on worldly things or people, you will soon shut
Me out and lose My grace.

2. As soon as you become too interested in worldly pleasure and ease, your conscience
objects. You are your own worst enemy when you act against your conscience. The wrong
which you do becomes worse when you try to excuse yourself or justify your actions.

3. No man can safely enjoy life except the man whose conscience is clear. The wicked
never have true joy nor real interior peace. They may say that they have peace and that they
neither expect nor fear any harm from above Either they are lying or they are fools. My
justice will suddenly strike them and put an end to their deeds. They will think differently
then.

4. A bad conscience is afraid and disturbed A good conscience has peace even in time of
hardship. The good man's glory lies in the testimony of a good conscience.

5. There is no true freedom nor profitable joy without a clear conscience and a holy fear of
all sin. Blessed is the man whose eyes are on Me and who keeps his earthly desires within
My law. A good life follows My wisdom and brings a deeper appreciation of this earthly
existence.

THINK:
God made man intelligent enough to see that he should do what is right. And so the sinner
knows that he is a sinner. He knows that his life is not going well. If he wants to cling to
sins, he will try to excuse himself in some way, but he cannot fool himself for long. Either
he loses his peace of soul or he succeeds in dulling his conscience. The man with a dull
conscience will find distractions and interests in many things, but he has not the abiding
peace of those who live for Heaven.

PRAY:
Dear Lord, grant that I may never be insincere in my daily life. Let me always have the
strength, the courage and the loyalty to follow what is right. I do not want to choose any
temporary satisfaction or relief which is displeasing to You. Let me live for eternity by
always choosing what You want me to choose. May death never catch me by surprise. I
hope to live each hour of the day in loyalty to Your holy Will and at peace with You.
Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 9

Frailty of Human Nature


CHRIST: MY CHILD, all human beings are weak. Do not think that you are stronger than
others. Circumstances do not create the weakness of a man. They simply draw it out and
show what he really is. You must be convinced of this fact. Your will is weak, and your
blind human desires are strong.

2. It should not be too hard for you to admit your frailty. See how often you are troubled by
a small matter! At times you resolve to become a better man. Then along comes a small
temptation, and away goes your resolution. just when you think you are safe, when you
least expect it, you find yourself pushed over by a slight temptation. Even when you do not
give full consent to it, your feelings and desires confuse you. Hateful imaginations rush in
on you and refuse to leave.

3. Before you can become serious about self-perfection, you must be convinced of its
necessity. See how weak you are! You often tend toward what is wrong. You confess your
sins today, and tomorrow you commit the same faults again. You resolve to be on your
guard, and an hour later you act as though you had never made the resolution. You are so
weak and unsteady. It is only right, then, that you should humble yourself and refuse to
think too highly of yourself.

4. You are more inclined to go backward than forward. You do not remain in the same state
of mind for any length of time. Your moods and attitudes change with the changing hours
of the day. If you would only turn to Me! I can help you rise above these changing moods.
Let your heart turn to Me and find its rest in Me.

THINK:
My human nature is like a spirited horse. It must be controlled at every step. It would like
to run free and uncontrolled. Therefore, I need not be surprised at my changing feelings
and moods. They are not the higher self within me. God will honor me only for what I am
trying to be. I would improve much faster if I begged His help more frequently by prayer
and the sacraments. Too often I fail to put up a fight against my unreasonable feelings and
blind desires. At other times I try to fight them alone. Only with God's help can I make any
permanent progress. With the knowledge He gives me through His holy Church, and with
the strength He offers me in His sacraments, I can live a holy life in spite of the restless
lower self within me.

PRAY:
Dear Lord, my smallness and weakness are perfectly known to You. Have pity on me. Pull
me out of the mud of self, so that I may not be stuck in it forever. Consider the labors and
trials of my daily life. Please stand by me in my efforts. Strengthen me in my resolutions. I
have often failed because I depended on myself alone. Now, however, I shall seek advice
and direction as often as I need it. Only in this way can I hope to make progress in true and
solid virtue. Make me wise and honest in my daily efforts, so that I may no longer waste
valuable time. I hope to become at last the kind of person You want me to be. Without You
I can do nothing. Lord, help met. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 10:

Daily Renewal of Intention


CHRIST: MY CHILD, progress in virtue depends on My grace and your own
determination. My grace is always at your disposal. It is your determination that wavers
and changes. Your intention would be more firm if you obtained more grace to help you.
By prayer and sacrifice, and with an increased use of My sacraments, seek more grace.
Then you would find your will stronger to follow your intention throughout the day.

2. It is not always enough to make good intentions in the morning. You must also recall
and renew them during the day. Examine how faithfully you are following your intention,
and seek to improve yourself in this effort. When you break your resolution, begin again.
This is far better than abandoning your good intention altogether. Anyone can make good
resolutions, but keeping them and renewing them is the work of a real man.

3. If you are afraid to start again or are discouraged by failure, it is because you do not
understand what goes on in your daily life. Without Me you can do nothing. Put your trust
in My help, Then confidently do your best to follow your resolutions. If you fail, renew
your intention at once and begin again. I will judge you more by your efforts than by your
failures. It is your natural pride that makes you afraid to begin, or discourages you when
you fail. Pride wants immediate success.

4. Be honest, and you will be humble. Make a sincere effort, but do not be surprised at your
weakness and unexpected failures. Beg for My grace, and go on trying. Leave all else in
My hands. He who keeps trying to please Me will never be abandoned by Me.

THINK:
Am I brave enough to renew my intentions and good resolutions each day, and to make an
honest effort to follow them? God's help will not fail me. My old faults will slowly
disappear as I advance in the practice of the opposite virtues. Thus, if I have a fault of
laziness, I can best conquer it by seeking more opportunities to perform good deeds. And
so will it be with my other faults.

PRAY:
Lord, let me do whatever is necessary to fight my faults and to advance in the opposite
virtues. If I need to avoid some person or place, if I have to take some particular step, let
me do so without any foolish delay. It is for Your glory and for my own greater good.
Lord, now I begin, and shall keep on beginning again and again because I desire to please
You. Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 11

An Honest Daily Effort


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, so often your thoughts are on unimportant things. You do not center them
enough on Me nor on your greatest need. After a few moments of recollection, your
thoughts go right back to useless distractions. As a result you rarely get a good look at
yourself and your actions. You hardly know your real worth because you take so little
notice of your desires, motives, and intentions. You fail to be impressed by your many
faults because you are blind to what is going on within your heart. Your interior motives
are often selfish and corrupt. Consequently, your external actions are very imperfect and
unsatisfactory. From a pure heart come the fruits of a good life, but from an imperfect heart
there can only come an imperfect life.
2. External activity proceeds from internal vigor. If you serve Me only by external
observances, you are no true follower of Mine. You must apply the ax to the root of your
troubles. Learn to control this selfish nature of yours, and you will possess My peace. I
daily offer you My grace for this divine purpose. Do not keep looking at your weakness.
Do not be afraid to make the attempt. Nothing is impossible to Me. Fix your eyes on Me
and make a sincere effort to follow My Will. Your difficulties will gradually vanish.
3. Try as you will, you will always make a number of unavoidable mistakes. Still, with a
little violence to yourself, you will gradually be able to serve Me with more ease. If you
rooted out of your life one single fault each year, you would soon become a perfect man.
Nowadays, however, people seem to be at their best at the beginning of their conversion.
They consider it a great accomplishment if they do not become worse with time.

THINK:
Many admit that they have faults. When, however, any particular fault of theirs is pointed
out to them, they will immediately justify themselves. They simply refuse to come face to
face with any particular fault of theirs. As a result they live a lifetime with little progress in
virtue. To better my life I must see and admit what is wrong. Then I can proceed to
improve myself.

PRAY:
My God, make me brave enough to face my faults, honest enough to acknowledge them,
and strong enough to fight them. I think of many things each day, but so many of my
interests are unimportant and useless. Give me the strength and the generosity to make
definite resolutions against definite faults. May I never be so selfish as to stop trying to
please You more each day. Though my faults seem to continue, still my efforts must
remain firm and I must go on trying to become daily a better man. If I will go on trying, I
cannot help becoming better each day. A continued effort will slowly destroy my
selfishness, and my faults will gradually weaken and die. Lord, on You I depend for the
light and strength for this daily battle. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 12

Extreme Love of This Life


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, learn wisdom from the folly of worldly people. See how hard they take their
worldly losses! For an earthly gain men will labor and suffer so much, but their spiritual
losses are so easily forgotten. They are often interested in matters which have little or no
value, and they negligently pass over matters which are important. Their entire attention is
often absorbed by external affairs. Unless you fight to control your thoughts, you too will
be enslaved by the passing events of the present moment.

2. How foolish are those who do not realize their miserable condition, making this passing
earthly life the only object of their desires! Some cling so to this life that, if they could
remain here forever, they would not care at all for the Kingdom of God. They would prefer
to stay on earth even though they might have to strain and struggle for the bare necessities
of this earthly existence.

3. How foolish and blind these people are! They lie buried so deep in earthly things that
they enjoy only the pleasures of the senses. In a short while, they will come to the end of
their earthly life. Then they will have a bitter realization of the uselessness and nothingness
of what they loved.

THINK:
The best way to realize the quickly-passing value of earthly attractions, is to look at them
in the past. Where are the enjoyments of last year? What became of the glory for which I
struggled so hard five years ago? What's left of last summer's pleasures? Gone! All finished
and gone! Do I want to go on living for that kind of happiness or do I want perfect, allsatisfying-
never-ending happiness? Only a fool would hesitate in answering this question.
PRAY:
Lord and Father of all intelligence, may I never be guilty of the supreme folly-the folly of
those who believe in living for today's earthly pleasures, without bothering about their
eternal salvation. In the Gospel You speak of the man who sat back and prepared to think
only of the pleasure and enjoyment of his earthly possessions. To him You said: "Thou
fool! This night will they require thy soul of thee!" He died that night, unprepared to face
his judge. Let me always face life's greatest fact-I live for Heaven or for hell. My earthly
life will show what choice I make. My God, give me the strength to live a holy life on earth
so that I may receive the eternal reward of Heavenly life with You. Amen.

The Four Last Things

FEW THINGS in this earthly life are absolutely certain. The most undebatable of these is
death. Every man, even the atheist, will admit this much. Death, however, is not the very
last event in this life of ours. Right after death, we shall be judged. Our private judgment
will be repeated on the Day of judgment, when all men will know us for what we are.
Our judgment will depend on how we live this earthly life of ours. If we have honestly
done our best and followed the commandments of Christ, we shall be rewarded with the
perfect life of Heaven. If, however, we have disregarded His loving directions and refused
to make use of His generous help, we shall be condemned to hell.

Death, judgment, Heaven, and hell-these are the four last things toward which we are
moving each hour of the day and night. They will never frighten us if our conscience is
clear. If we love God in our daily life, that is, if we are sincerely trying to know and follow
His holy Will, we have no reason to fear.

By keeping this eternal goal ever before us, we shall think straight when life's problems and
difficulties face us. In making the following meditations, we must strive to become
eternity-minded. We must seek to guarantee to ourselves, as far as is in our power, the
unending success and unmarred happiness of Heaven.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 13

Nearness of Death

CHRIST:
MY CHILD, in a little while this earthly life of yours will be over. just how ready are you
to enter into the next Life? Man exists today, and tomorrow he is seen no more. When he is
out of sight, he is quickly also out of mind. The human heart can be so dull and hard! It
fixes its attention on things present. It often fails to provide for the things that are to come.

2. In the morning consider for a moment the fact that you may not live till evening. When
evening comes do not be too confident that you will see the next morning. These thoughts
should not make you gloomy, but practical. Live in such a way that death will never find
you unprepared. Live each day as you would want to live the last day of your life. Too
many die suddenly and unprepared. I have warned everyone: "The Son of Man will come at
that hour when He is not expected."

3. How many have deceived themselves into thinking that they still had plenty of time.
They were snatched unexpectedly from this life. How often have you heard that someone
was killed in a fight; another was drowned; another fell and broke his neck? This man died
while sitting at table. That one passed away while enjoying a game. Some die by fire; some
by violence; some are destroyed by disease; some are killed at the hands of robbers. Thus
death brings an end to all, and man's life suddenly passes away like a fleeting shadow.

THINK:
Why should I refuse to face facts? Will I die any sooner if I think of death? Or am I going
to escape death if I never think of it. The most terrible death which can come to me is the
death which will find me in mortal sin. Every other aspect of death is a passing thing, but
this last phase—the unprovided death—will hurt me forever.

Death, with all its uncertainties, is a fact. I should face facts and see what can be done
about them. What can I do about death? I can live in such a way that no matter when death
comes, it will find me in sanctifying grace.

PRAY:
Lord, for those in mortal sin, death is the gateway to hell, but for those in sanctifying grace,
it is the pathway to Heaven. Let my greatest desire in life be to live in such a way that I can
die fearlessly at any moment. Let me fear sin more than death or any other earthly harm.
Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 14

Man's Last Moments

CHRIST:
MY CHILD, when your last hour arrives, you will see this earthly life in a new
light. If you were neglectful and careless about My law, you will have great regret. If you
lived as I desire, your heart will be full of joy.

2. The time is coming when you would like to have another day, or even one more hour, to
make up for the past. Take your day and your hour now that you have the time. Who can
guarantee you another hour when you feel life slipping away?

3. Death may come at any time. Always be ready for it. In this way you will be free of fear
or danger, no matter when My angel calls you from this life. Live in such a way that the
hour of death may bring you joy rather than fear.

4. Never love any earthly thing too much. Place your confidence in Me and look to Me as
your greatest Treasure. I am far more to you than you can even suspect. A weak soul is
enslaved by its earthly desires and loves. The prayerful man gains a heavenly liberty from
this life, a liberty which is not understood by worldly men.

THINK:
No matter what my interests may be, or how important they may seem, when death comes,
I will leave everything and go to my judgment at once. Others will take my place and
assume my importance and my activities. Few people know that their death is near. Most
men are surprised by the arrival of death. To those who love God, it is a cause of joy.
To those who love this earthly life too much, it is a painful parting.

PRAY:
My God, make me wise in my esteem for the work, the pleasures, the honor and the
successes of this earthly life. Let me want nothing that might separate me from You. My
first interest shall be to please You, to do everything as You desire. In this way, I hope to
be ready for eternity every moment of the day. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 15

The Peace of a Good Concience

CHRIST:
MY CHILD, if you have a good conscience, you need not have any fear of death. It is
better to try to avoid sin than to try to escape death.

2. A wise man reflects often on the hour of death, so as to be prepared for it at all times.

3. If you want to please Me, try to become today the kind of man you would like to be at
the time of your death. Make this effort, and death will find you full of confidence and
peace. For this must you daily strive: a healthy contempt for worldly comforts, a burning
desire to advance in virtue, a love of right order in your actions, a spirit of penance,
readiness to obey authority, self-discipline, and patience to bear adversity for My sake.

THINK:
A good conscience means that I have honestly tried to learn what God desires of me, and I
have sincerely tried to do what He desires. Without these two efforts there is no good
conscience. A man who knows that he has really made those two efforts, has a good
conscience. To such a man, God gives His peace. Others may be distracted with earthly
activities and interests, but they do not have that interior peace which can remain calm even
in the face of death.

PRAY:
My God, I hope to obtain Your holy assistance so that I may never avoid learning Your
holy Will, nor ever fail to follow it in my daily life. I may find a little less pleasure if I
follow Your Will, but I shall enjoy Your peace, which is greater than any pleasure. If ever I
become selfish enough to avoid Your Will, let my conscience disturb and annoy me until I
return to You. Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 16

Being Ready for Death

CHRIST:

MY CHILD, your actions and thoughts should always be as orderly as though you
expected to die this day. If you are unprepared today, how will you be prepared tomorrow?
Tomorrow is uncertain. How do you know that you will be alive tomorrow? If you have
ever seen person pass away, just reflect that you too must pass away as he did.

2. You can do many good works while you enjoy good health, but when you are sick, who
knows what you will be able to do? Few people are improved by sickness. So too, those
who have too many worldly interests seldom increase in holiness, because they are full of
distractions. Recollection and prayer are the seeds of a good life; and a good life is the path
to a holy death.

3. It is better to provide for yourself while you are still here in this life. Do not rely on the
prayers and help of others after your death. The present time is precious. Now is your
opportunity. This is your day of salvation. Spend today profitably. Send your prayers,
sacrifices and good works to Me before you come to Me to be judged. It is within your
power to earn eternal life by a wise use of this present time.

4. Think often of death, and remember that time lost will never return. You have not a
lasting dwelling on this earth. In this life you are like a traveler. You will never have rest
until you are united with Me, your Saviour.

THINK:
Few things are certain in this earthly life. The most certain fact of all is that I am to die.
When? Where? How? I know not. That I shall die, however, is certain. Many people are
dying at this very moment. I am too busy with my own life to give much thought to them.
So will it be when I am dying. That moment will be very important to me, but the world
will go right on about its business. If I do not prepare for death by a good life, I am a fool.

PRAY:
Lord, let me not fear death with an empty fear, but with a wise and holy fear. An empty
fear does not make men any better, but a wise and holy fear urges them to improve their
lives. I will prepare for death by trying today to please you more and more in my thoughts,
desires, words and actions. If I live this day as You desire, I shall be ready at any moment,
and death will be nothing worse than Your loving call. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 17

The Coming Judgment

CHRIST:

MY CHILD, you must one day give a full account of your earthly life. How will you stand
before Me, the just judge, from Whom nothing is hidden? I take no bribes and accept no
excuses. At present you can take advantage of My Divine Mercy. When this earthly life is
over, you will receive strict justice.

2. Can you be so great a fool as to go on putting off your good resolutions, when pardon
can be so easily obtained now? If you go on postponing your resolutions, how will you face
My Divine justice-you who are sometimes frightened by an angry fellow-human?

3. Why not begin today to prepare for the day of judgment? You will find it far less terrible
if you begin now to live as I command. On the day of judgment no man can be excused or
defended by another. Each one will find it difficult enough to answer for his own sins.

THINK:
While I am on earth, my efforts are useful, my tears are acceptable, my sorrow has power
to purify my soul. God desires to forgive me here and now. It is better to wash away my
sins and correct my bad habits now, rather than leave them for purification after death. I am
deceiving myself when I follow my feelings and put off my repentance and resolutions.

PRAY:
Lord, let me think of my sins and be sorry for them, so that on the day of judgment, I may
enjoy security with Your angels and saints. Teach me to do penance in little things now, so
that I may not be subjected to worse sufferings hereafter. True, I should do all of this in
loyalty to You. Yet, I am so selfish that I must have some fear to spur me on when my love
for You fails. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 18

The Day of Judgment

CHRIST:

MY CHILD, those who are loyal to My commandments in this life, will not be in terror on
the Day of judgment. The sign of the cross will appear in the sky when I come to judge the
world. Then all my loyal followers, the followers of the cross, will come with great
confidence to Me, their crucified King and judge.

2. On that day, the just shall stand against those who annoyed and persecuted them. Those
who humbly bore the judgments of their fellowmen, will rise to judge the rest on that day.
The poor and the humble will have great confidence and joy, but the proud and the selfish
lovers of this world will have many reasons to be afraid.

3. In that hour everyone will see that the wisest people were those who preferred to follow
My commandments and live My way. They will no longer be considered fools by the
worldly-minded. All wrong-doing will be silenced and condemned, while every suffering
endured with patience, will bring joy and gladness. The unreligious will be sad, but My
devoted followers will be filled with happiness. Many will thank Me for the hardships and
trials which they bore on earth. That day will show forth My power, wisdom, and majesty.

THINK:
Like a river that flows ever onward toward the sea, the current of daily life moves ever
onward toward the Day of judgment. That day will correct the wrong standards and foolish
ideals of worldly men. It will be the Day of Truth, the triumph of holiness. Will I drift
along on my daily course or will I regularly check my direction by an intelligent self examination?
I prepare for a joyful judgment or a fearful one by the kind of life I live
today.

PRAY:
O Jesus, My judge and King, I refuse to drift along each day until death takes me by
surprise. I want to follow Your standards as You speak to me today through Your Church.
Tell me how You want me to live and I hope to follow Your every wish. I need not fear the
judgment if only I will be loyal to You in my daily life. Amen.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 19

God's Standards


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, on the Day of judgment the rags of the poor will shine more brilliantly than
the fine clothes of those who loved this earthly life too much. The homes of the poor will
be honored more than the comfortable mansions of the rich. In that hour the patience of My
loyal followers will have greater merit than the human might of this world. Simple
obedience to My laws will be more highly praised than all earthly cleverness.

2. In the Day of Truth a pure and good conscience will bring more joy than mere learning.
The man who refused to sin for earthly gain, will be the envy of those who lived only for
this world. You will have more consolation for having prayed devoutly than for having
enjoyed earth's pleasures and comforts.

3. Then you will be glad of the prayerful silence you observed, rather than for having
talked a great deal. Good works will be of greater value than good words. Self-control and
healthy penance will be more pleasing to you than all the delights of earth.

THINK:
How different are God's standards from those of worldly men I Is it any wonder that those
who live God's way seem to live a foolish life? Yet the real fools are those who disagree
with God's standards. Christ is sure to triumph at the judgment, and those who follow His
standards are certain to triumph with Him.

PRAY:
My Jesus, can I be fool enough to live by any other standard than Yours? Let me embrace
Your standards in my daily life. Though I may find life harder, I will not complain as long
as I know that Your Will is guiding me. Through the Church and the Scriptures, You
promise to lead me to a happy judgment and a joyful eternity. I hope to be a loyal follower
of Yours each day of my earthly life. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 20

The Pains of Hell


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, I have proved My goodness by My numberless gifts to men. They cannot
mention a single good thing in their daily life which does not belong to Me. My love for
them was proved by My earthly life of labor, work, suffering and prayer to obtain
forgiveness for their sins. Anyone who takes time to think of what I deserve, cannot deny
that he owes Me more than he can ever repay. Yet, in spite of My goodness and love, some
people choose to walk away from Me. They refuse to follow My directions. As a result
they fall into sin. Though I made them for Heaven, they shall never see it because they are
refusing to do what it takes to get there.

2. Hell was made for the devil and his rebel angels. Man was made for Heaven. In refusing
to live for Heaven, a man chooses to exist without Me. He shall have his wish-he shall join
the rebel angels in hell. In refusing to follow My law, a man actually turns his back on Me
as the fallen angels did. If he dies in this condition, he condemns himself to hell. The jury
which convicts him is his own sinful life. I merely pronounce sentence on what he himself
has chosen.

3. There is nothing on earth which can compare with hell. It is beyond all description. One
must see it to know it. Though I may try to give you some small idea of it in this chapter,
remember, this is a tiny and very imperfect idea of the real thing. Words fall far short of the
reality which is hell. I make no threats here. I simply want you to face this fact: Unless you
live for Heaven, you shall one day be in hell.

4. All the sufferings known to man are as nothing in comparison with the sufferings of hell.
The wise man would rather bear any trial on earth than place himself in danger of hell. One
single hour of hell will be harder than a hundred years of suffering on earth. In this earthly
life people have some rest from their labors and trials. They get some measure of
consolation from their friends. In hell, however, there is no rest, no consolation, and no
friends.

5. The fires of hell will never die. There will be no end to suffering. One will find no
comfort in knowing that he has been there a thousand years. He can never hope for an end
to his tortures. All the other sufferings would be bearable if only the damned could hope
for relief. Despair is hell's bitterest pain.

6. In hell a man will be punished through the same faults by which he sinned on earth. Each
sin will have its own particular torment. The lazy will be forced to work continuously. The
gluttonous will be tormented with extreme hunger and thirst. The proud will be filled with
confusion, and the greedy will feel the pinch of miserable want.

7. And yet, the worst pain of hell is none of these. The people in hell would gladly bear all
of this and much more if only they could hope for My friendship and love, no matter how
long it might take, be it even a billion years from now. Their keenest torment is that they
have forever lost Me, the Source of all true joy and perfect happiness. This suffering makes
hell the home of despair and undying hatred.

8. My child, follow My Will in your daily life, and you need never fear hell. In fact you
have every reason to be joyful and merry if you are following My commandments and
using My sacraments. Do not condemn yourself to hell by refusing to obey My directions. I
love you dearly. Do not prevent Me from taking you to Heaven.

THINK:
Hell is a fact. Christ, Our Lord, pointed this out time and again during His earthly life.
Whoever rejects this fact is simply denying the word of Christ. He is God. He proved His
divine power many times during and after His earthly life. His word is truth. He preached
the truth of hell and continues to preach it today through His Church and Holy Scripture.

PRAY:
My Jesus, many find too hard a command in the words: "Deny yourself, take up your cross,
and follow Me." Yet a much harder command will be: "Depart from Me, you cursed, into
everlasting fire." If I become so impatient with a little suffering now, how can I ever stand
hell? I cannot expect to have unrestricted enjoyment on earth and still rejoice with You in
Heaven. Therefore, dear Lord, that I may be safe from eternal punishment, let me do my
best in bearing the burdens of this earthly life. Let me prefer to suffer on earth or even die
now rather than commit a mortal sin.

[Hildegard of Bingen]

CONVERSION

CHAPTER 21

Holy Fear of God


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, if you desire to make progress along the way to Heaven, keep in your heart a
holy fear of the Divine justice. It is only reasonable that you should be afraid to hurt
yourself. When you bring sin into your life, you are making yourself an object of My
justice. I, the Eternal Truth, cannot accept you as good if you have become bad by sin.
Therefore, keep your earthly desires under control and refuse to surrender yourself to
unnecessary or dangerous pleasures. This holy fear of My justice will help you to stay free
of the slavery of earthly attractions.

2. It is not very wise to think only of having a pleasant time and to forget your spiritual
needs. It is reasonable and good for you to be afraid of losing My graces. Without them
you can never reach the perfect life and happiness of Heaven.

3. If your love of Me is not yet strong enough to hold you back from doing wrong, then let
your fear of hell keep you from sinning. A man who lacks this wise and holy fear, will not
go on doing good for long. He will soon fall into Satan's snares, as he becomes more
careless in avoiding temptations. This fear is a holy thing because it is given by Me. It
makes a man strong in the daily battle against his unreasoning and selfish desires.

4. Even the saints, with all their confidence in Me, had this fear of Divine justice. They
knew the weakness and blindness of human nature. They were not less careful, nor less
humble, because of their great virtues and many graces.

THINK:
If my love of God ever fails to hold me back from sin, it will be because my self-love is
strong at the moment. Yet, even then I can make a last effort against this misguided love by
the thought of God's justice, which will deal with me as I deserve. It is a foolish man,
indeed, who will refuse to consider the harm that can overtake him if he follows a certain
path. This holy fear of God's justice is "the beginning of wisdom" because it guides men on
to a holier life.

PRAY:
My God, I do not want to presume so much on Your love as to forget Your justice. You
will some day deal with each man according to his works. I desire to make good use of all
the gifts which Your love daily sends me. May I never forget that I must one day account
for my misuse of these gifts. This thought will help me to fight sin and to please You more
in my daily life. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 22

Compunction of Heart

CHRIST:
MY CHILD, how can any man abandon himself to the pleasures of this earthly life? Such
people do not appreciate the miserable condition of their souls, nor the rapid passing away
of this brief experience. They do not stop to think and to look beneath the surface of their
daily activities. They laugh when they have many reasons to weep. Happy is he who can
overcome the distractions which hinder him from straight thinking.

2. As for you, strive to develop within yourself a genuine compunction of heart.
Compunction is a deep and lasting sorrow for your sins. It is not a gloomy nor depressing
sorrow, but an intelligent admission of your sins and a sincere determination to do
something about them. Since compunction comes from a realization of how you have failed
so good a God, it brings with it a readiness to accept anything from My Hand.

3. Compunction opens the way to many blessings and precious graces. When compunction
fills your soul, the world will lose its magic attraction and will become more distasteful to
you. Compunction will help you realize how quickly earthly joys pass away, while eternity
goes on forever. You will see clearly that your sins have off ended Me. One who has
genuine compunction, is honest enough to admit his sins, and is truly sorry for them. His
sorrow is proved by his sincere efforts to be rid of his faults.

THINK:
Compunction is a great grace by which God helps me to face the truth about my sins. It
also helps me to prove my sorrow for my faults. By compunction a man begins to attack his
faults and to practice the opposite virtues. I can be sure of my sincere sorrow only when I
have begun to do something about my faults. Compunction is a lasting sorrow because it is
not an emotion, but rather an intelligent admission of facts. It shows me my faults, God's
goodness, and my own need to change for the better. Then it helps me undertake the daily
task of abandoning my faults and acquiring the opposite virtues.

PRAY:
Lord, I want to live a cheerful life, but I do not want that kind of cheerfulness which
refuses to admit the truth. I can admit my sins and still be cheerful, as long as I am doing
my best to overcome and make up for these sins. I do not want any gift or talent which
might make me proud, or worse in any way. Not everything that is high is holy; nor is
every pleasant thing good. Good desires are not always unselfish. You, my Lord, are not
always pleased with the things that we prize. It is far better to have compunction than to be
able to talk about it. Grant me genuine compunction, so that I may hate my sins and daily
fight against them. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 23

Striving for Compunction

CHRIST:
MY CHILD, unless a man tries hard to acquire a holy sorrow for his sins, he is not worthy
of My heavenly consolation. Are you doing your best to acquire this compunction?

2. This grace will reach you more easily if you will turn your back, for a while, on your
daily distractions. Come aside more often, to be alone with Me. Reflect on My gifts and
your misuse of them. Be honest and face the truth. Reading and reflecting will help you to
realize the wickedness of all sins, even smaller ones. Do not look for new theories and
mere curiosities, but stick to solid everyday truth, truth which will improve your daily life.

3. In solitude and quiet you will discover the hidden treasures of Holy Scripture. As you
become more intimate with Me, your Creator, you will make great progress. You will find
tears to wash and purify your soul. You will also have a deep interior joy as My holy
angels and I draw near to you. Learn to pray and labor unseen by the eyes of men.

4. Slowly, as the gift of compunction fills your soul, you will be filled with fresh vigor. As
you become more eager to make up for your sins, you will find hard things becoming
easier.

THINK:
Jesus said that certain devils are driven out only by prayer and fasting. This shows that
some of God's gifts are given only if we do our part to prepare ourselves for them.
Compunction will be lasting and fruitful only if I make a sincere personal effort to receive
it worthily and apply it wisely. Through solitude, prayer, reading, and meditation, I will
understand how I can best receive and use compunction in my daily life.

PRAY:
O holy and merciful Father, fill my soul with true compunction. Make me honest in
admitting my sins, and determined in overcoming them each day. I need Your assistance,
so that I may not be a coward, but may make a sincere daily effort to please You more in
all my activities. Help me to abandon anything in life which is opposed to Your holy gift of
compunction. Amen.


CONVERSION

CHAPTER 24

Purgatory Here or Hereafter


CHRIST:
MY CHILD, do not expect to find peace until you have overcome a variety of troubles and
opposition. If you say that you cannot bear much suffering now, how will you be able to
endure the purifying pains of Purgatory hereafter?

2. The patient man finds a cleansing purgatory in this earthly life. When others wrong him,
he is more sorry that evil is done than that he has been wronged. He forgives the evil-doer
from the bottom of his heart. He is not slow to ask pardon when he himself has hurt others.
He is more easily moved to pity than to anger. He frequently disregards his feelings and
tries to live above them, according to his intelligence and My grace.

THINK:
Either here on earth or hereafter in Purgatory I must make up for each fault I commit.
Nothing tainted will be allowed to enter Heaven. I can purify my soul now by following the
example and words of Christ, my Redeemer. He gained for me the grace to conquer sin and
error. Now I must do my part by living a holy life. If I refuse, and die in venial sin, I'll have
to make it up in Purgatory. If I die in mortal sin, I shall condemn myself to hell forever.

PRAY:
My Jesus, you fulfilled Your Father's Will largely by Your patience during Your earthly
life. Therefore, it is only right that I, a miserable sinner, should be patient in my own daily
life. Even though this present life may feel like a burden, still, by the help of Your grace, it
is a great opportunity to earn heavenly merit. Your holy example and the lives of Your
saints, make this life lighter and more bearable for those who take time out each day so as
to see more clearly Your way to Heaven. Amen.